AlrightyRoo
01-03-2008, 01:30 PM
I wanted to repost this on the new board. I am sorry it is so long. :o
My Birth Story
My birth story begins at 2 am on September 3rd 2006. I woke up with contractions every 10 minutes. This was not at all unusual for the past 6 weeks or so. ( I was almost 3 weeks past my “due date” and had been having prodromal labor for many weeks) I tossed and turned and drank water, but I couldn’t go back to sleep. I tried reading for a while to try to get sleep again, but I am a very light sleeper.
Finally after about an hour of the contractions I decided to wake my hubby and talk to him about when we should call the midwife. Being the heaviest sleeper I have ever heard of, it took a while to get Adam awake enough to get a coherent thought out of him. Finally we decided that we would wait another hour and then call Terri (the midwife) to see when she wanted to come over. We called Terri and she decided to start making her way over because my contractions were now 8 minutes apart. She lives about 45 minutes from our house. She also called another midwife to come and help.
While waiting, Adam started blowing up the birth pool. The noise and light ended up waking up our 3.5 year old son, Garrett. He was thrilled to “help” daddy blow up the pool. The contractions were still very mild and I was having fun hanging out with my family, anticipating this new baby. I wasn’t scared about the labor, I was very emotionally prepared for birth. I was excited to finally experience this labor naturally. I was induced with Garrett and never got past 4-5 cm after 36 hours and eventually had a c-section. Starting labor on my own was a whole new experience.
Garrett’s birth wasn’t what most people would call traumatic. Try telling that to my mind and body. Because of hospital policies I was unable to see or hold him for about 4 hours after the birth. Not because of any medical issue of his, but simply because I had had a cesarean section. It took me a couple of years to heal emotionally from the birth. I was determined not to let that negative experience define and change the homebirth I was planning.
Terri was taking her time getting to us. When she arrived, I had been in labor for about 4 hours. I was having contractions about every 8 minutes or so. My mom arrived soon after and she and Terri took Garrett to get some breakfast. Adam and I walked around the neighborhood, he rubbed my back a little and we talked. When Terri got back, she decided to take me on a bigger walk. Uh oh. I know what a big walk means to Terri. She had my 10 month pregnant behind trekking up and down hills for about 2 miles. I had a few contractions along the way, but nothing major.
When we got back to the house, I showered and changed. It was then that my body decided to kick into a higher gear. (Thanks Terri!) I really got down to business. I was all over the place. In bed, on the birth ball, in the shower, on the floor. I was slowly progressing in centimeters, but the baby wasn’t moving down. The baby was still at +3 station. I had been in labor for quite some time now. I was beginning to tire. We finally filled the birth tub. In the mean time, the midwives had me sit on a birth stool to bring the baby down in the pelvis. I was kind of scared because I thought the pressure would be unbearable. It turned out to be not too bad. It was actually fairly comfortable.
Once the tub was filled and I stepped into that warm water, there was no way I was going to get out. A friend of mine calls it a hydrodural, and boy is that true! It was the most heavenly feeling. By this time I was deep into active labor. I don’t really recall the passing of the time. It was definitely evening time. I don’t even remember Garrett being put to bed.
I had started to really vocalize with the contractions. Occasionally moans but for the most part, I would moan OPEN or Come Down Baby, but eventually as the contractions became really intense I would moan I Can Do It! In the middle of a contraction that became I Am Doing It! That coupled with focusing on my husband’s eyes got me through a 36 hour intense drug-free labor.
After about 24 hours of labor the midwives were trying everything they could to bring the baby down. We tried squatting, pelvic press, the birth ball, every position we could think of. I was about 8 cm but the baby was still about +2 station. After about 30 hours of labor at home, we decided to try and break the water, the midwives thought the baby was low enough to prevent cord prolapse and so we figured it may be our last option. It was mine and my husband’s decision to make. Terri warned us that they would be checking the baby’s heart rate carefully afterward and if there was any sign of distress we would most likely need to be transferred to the hospital.
When she broke my water, I thought that maybe I was giving birth to Noah’s ark. There was so much water flowing out of me I thought it would never end. It gushed and gushed. Immediately the midwives were checking the baby’s heartrate. It seemed to be okay for a bit. But they started to spot some trouble. They discussed our options with us. I had been in labor for over 30 hours. I was exhausted. The baby was still high. The baby may not be able to take more labor. They weren’t overly concerned yet, but they felt like the best course of action would be to transfer to the hospital. The decision was left to me and Adam. We decided that what was safest for baby was what we wanted. Now that it looked like it would be safer in the hospital, that is where we would go. That is what my mind said. My heart was a different story. I had prepared for this for two years. I couldn’t believe that it was going up in smoke.
We packed a hasty bag, and I said goodbye to Garrett and my mom. We headed for the van. We were going to meet Terri at the hospital. My labor had slowed once I knew I was going to the hospital. Still, I had contractions (very intense ones) every few minutes. The ride to the hospital was terrible. I was an emotional wreck and I was struggling with the contractions. The same ones that were manageable at home where I felt safe and nurtured were almost unbearable in a van.
I was very nervous about how we were going to be treated when we told the staff that we were homebirth transfers. Our town doesn’t have the best reputation for acceptance of home birthing families. The staff at the ER seemed a little confused about our situation, but they weren’t unkind to us. Terri met us in the ER.
The ride up the elevator and to the maternity floor seemed interminable. Finally we were put in a room and I was put on a monitor and an IV and checked by the nurse. I was still 8 cm and the baby was still about +2 station.
Let me pause right here in the story and say that although this is the shortest part of the story (about 5 minutes tops in the 36 hour labor) it is the most horrifying part. My hands shake and my gut is in tangles as I write this 1 year later.
The on-call doctor strode into the room. When he came in I was in the middle of a contraction. I was focusing and breathing and concentrating on my husband like I had for a while. I didn’t really hear him at first, because he was speaking normally. But then he started to raise his voice. Louder and louder. It then started to filter through the contraction to me. He was yelling at us, telling us that he knew we had only come so that we could sue somebody. We were totally stunned.
He told me that he was going to insert an internal monitor right then and started moving my legs. I was still having my contraction which seemed like it would never end. It only got stronger. I was tensing up and that was making it worse.
I said, “No, wait!”
He said “I am going to do this. If you have a problem with it then we will go downstairs and get the lawyer and make you do it.”
My husband and midwife were telling him to wait, stop. He didn’t listen. He moved my legs and inserted the monitor. I was hysterical by this time. I didn’t hear what he was saying, but he yelled a few more times. He started walking out of the door. My husband followed him saying “Wait, Stop!” The doctor said “NO!” and marched out of the door.
My husband came back in and I was hysterical. We were all in shock. I was terrified of this man. I kept saying “He’s going to deliver my baby?! Oh my God! My baby, my baby! What do we do?” My midwife and husband were crying. The nurse was in the room for the entire thing. She was saying she didn’t know what happened with the doctor but that we would just keep going and have this baby. She was actually quite compassionate.
I must say that my entire labor was not painful. Incredibly intense. Requiring all my attention, yes. The only time that labor hurt for me was in the aftermath of the doctor’s assault, when I was screaming. I had a contraction and I started to completely panic. I started breathing rapidly and my eyes were darting around the room. I was sobbing. It was excruciating.
Finally my midwife looked into my eyes and told me that my baby needed me to be calm. My baby needed me to breathe slowly, to give him or her oxygen. I finally started to concentrate on breathing slowly and deeply. The contractions became bearable again.
Soon, my contractions changed a little bit. At the end, I would feel an uncontrollable urge to bear down. I actually didn’t understand what it was at first. Terri heard me grunting and her eyes got pretty wide and she had this tiny smile on her face. She asked “Are you pushing?” I said “I don’t know.”
Well, we decided to try to use the squat bar. Terri told me not to push with the urge, because I still had a bit of cervix left. She knew my body would do what it wanted anyway. I just shouldn’t try to help it along.
After a while, a doctor came in the room. She told me she was the new doctor on call. She was extremely kind to us. I was beyond relieved that I had a new doctor. She checked me and I was about 9 cm and the baby was still at +2 station. She left us to the squat bar and said she would be back later.
By this time I had been in labor almost 36 hours. The baby still had not come down. We decided to talk to the doctor about a C-Section. I was so incredibly disappointed. I couldn’t believe that I would be having another C-section. After all that I had planned and been through.
Once the decision was made, I was anxious to get the epidural. The anesthesiologist tried multiple times to get one into me. It was not taking. He tried one more time and this one worked everywhere except in my vagina. I felt every 9 cm contraction in my vagina!
We didn’t know the sex of the baby. One of the most important things to me in the birth was that Adam would get to tell me what the sex of the baby was. The doctor assured us that she would remind the nurses not to mention the sex when the baby was born.
I was still feeling every contraction in my vagina so they decided to give me a spinal. After that was in place and Adam was in the room, they began the surgery. I asked Adam to distract me so that I wouldn’t hear them talking about cutting me. We were getting excited about meeting our baby.
Finally they said the baby was about to be born. Adam stood up and saw our baby being born. I could hear the baby cry and I started to cry. Then Adam told me: We have a Mason! I started bawling. A baby boy! A brother for Garrett! I was so thrilled to have this blessing in my life.
They didn’t show me his face over the curtain like they did for Garrett. I could hear him crying. Adam went to see him. They let him cut the cord. I was anxious to see my new baby. I kept asking how he is. They kept saying how huge he is. They weighed him and he was 9 lbs 11 oz!
Adam brought him to me. I was in awe. He looked just like Garrett. Finally they had to take him to the nursery. Adam went with him. This was the difficult part. I didn’t want to be away from my baby for even a second.
After the surgery they took me to recovery and I only waited a minute or two when they brought me my beautiful baby boy, Mason Thomas ********. I undid his wrappings, placed him on my chest and latched him on to my breast. He had a beautiful latch. Daddy admired him with me for a few minutes and then Garrett came in. He loved seeing his brother. He was fascinated. I am sure he was a bit confused too. I had left the house that morning and then that afternoon he came to see me and I had a baby.
Although Mason’s birth was extremely traumatic for me, it was also quite empowering in a way. I was able to make the decisions that I felt were best for my baby and myself. Although the actions of that doctor will affect me forever, I hope that the legacy of this birth is the empowerment I received as a mother.
Mason Thomas ********, September 5th 2006, 9 lbs 11 oz, 22 inches
My Birth Story
My birth story begins at 2 am on September 3rd 2006. I woke up with contractions every 10 minutes. This was not at all unusual for the past 6 weeks or so. ( I was almost 3 weeks past my “due date” and had been having prodromal labor for many weeks) I tossed and turned and drank water, but I couldn’t go back to sleep. I tried reading for a while to try to get sleep again, but I am a very light sleeper.
Finally after about an hour of the contractions I decided to wake my hubby and talk to him about when we should call the midwife. Being the heaviest sleeper I have ever heard of, it took a while to get Adam awake enough to get a coherent thought out of him. Finally we decided that we would wait another hour and then call Terri (the midwife) to see when she wanted to come over. We called Terri and she decided to start making her way over because my contractions were now 8 minutes apart. She lives about 45 minutes from our house. She also called another midwife to come and help.
While waiting, Adam started blowing up the birth pool. The noise and light ended up waking up our 3.5 year old son, Garrett. He was thrilled to “help” daddy blow up the pool. The contractions were still very mild and I was having fun hanging out with my family, anticipating this new baby. I wasn’t scared about the labor, I was very emotionally prepared for birth. I was excited to finally experience this labor naturally. I was induced with Garrett and never got past 4-5 cm after 36 hours and eventually had a c-section. Starting labor on my own was a whole new experience.
Garrett’s birth wasn’t what most people would call traumatic. Try telling that to my mind and body. Because of hospital policies I was unable to see or hold him for about 4 hours after the birth. Not because of any medical issue of his, but simply because I had had a cesarean section. It took me a couple of years to heal emotionally from the birth. I was determined not to let that negative experience define and change the homebirth I was planning.
Terri was taking her time getting to us. When she arrived, I had been in labor for about 4 hours. I was having contractions about every 8 minutes or so. My mom arrived soon after and she and Terri took Garrett to get some breakfast. Adam and I walked around the neighborhood, he rubbed my back a little and we talked. When Terri got back, she decided to take me on a bigger walk. Uh oh. I know what a big walk means to Terri. She had my 10 month pregnant behind trekking up and down hills for about 2 miles. I had a few contractions along the way, but nothing major.
When we got back to the house, I showered and changed. It was then that my body decided to kick into a higher gear. (Thanks Terri!) I really got down to business. I was all over the place. In bed, on the birth ball, in the shower, on the floor. I was slowly progressing in centimeters, but the baby wasn’t moving down. The baby was still at +3 station. I had been in labor for quite some time now. I was beginning to tire. We finally filled the birth tub. In the mean time, the midwives had me sit on a birth stool to bring the baby down in the pelvis. I was kind of scared because I thought the pressure would be unbearable. It turned out to be not too bad. It was actually fairly comfortable.
Once the tub was filled and I stepped into that warm water, there was no way I was going to get out. A friend of mine calls it a hydrodural, and boy is that true! It was the most heavenly feeling. By this time I was deep into active labor. I don’t really recall the passing of the time. It was definitely evening time. I don’t even remember Garrett being put to bed.
I had started to really vocalize with the contractions. Occasionally moans but for the most part, I would moan OPEN or Come Down Baby, but eventually as the contractions became really intense I would moan I Can Do It! In the middle of a contraction that became I Am Doing It! That coupled with focusing on my husband’s eyes got me through a 36 hour intense drug-free labor.
After about 24 hours of labor the midwives were trying everything they could to bring the baby down. We tried squatting, pelvic press, the birth ball, every position we could think of. I was about 8 cm but the baby was still about +2 station. After about 30 hours of labor at home, we decided to try and break the water, the midwives thought the baby was low enough to prevent cord prolapse and so we figured it may be our last option. It was mine and my husband’s decision to make. Terri warned us that they would be checking the baby’s heart rate carefully afterward and if there was any sign of distress we would most likely need to be transferred to the hospital.
When she broke my water, I thought that maybe I was giving birth to Noah’s ark. There was so much water flowing out of me I thought it would never end. It gushed and gushed. Immediately the midwives were checking the baby’s heartrate. It seemed to be okay for a bit. But they started to spot some trouble. They discussed our options with us. I had been in labor for over 30 hours. I was exhausted. The baby was still high. The baby may not be able to take more labor. They weren’t overly concerned yet, but they felt like the best course of action would be to transfer to the hospital. The decision was left to me and Adam. We decided that what was safest for baby was what we wanted. Now that it looked like it would be safer in the hospital, that is where we would go. That is what my mind said. My heart was a different story. I had prepared for this for two years. I couldn’t believe that it was going up in smoke.
We packed a hasty bag, and I said goodbye to Garrett and my mom. We headed for the van. We were going to meet Terri at the hospital. My labor had slowed once I knew I was going to the hospital. Still, I had contractions (very intense ones) every few minutes. The ride to the hospital was terrible. I was an emotional wreck and I was struggling with the contractions. The same ones that were manageable at home where I felt safe and nurtured were almost unbearable in a van.
I was very nervous about how we were going to be treated when we told the staff that we were homebirth transfers. Our town doesn’t have the best reputation for acceptance of home birthing families. The staff at the ER seemed a little confused about our situation, but they weren’t unkind to us. Terri met us in the ER.
The ride up the elevator and to the maternity floor seemed interminable. Finally we were put in a room and I was put on a monitor and an IV and checked by the nurse. I was still 8 cm and the baby was still about +2 station.
Let me pause right here in the story and say that although this is the shortest part of the story (about 5 minutes tops in the 36 hour labor) it is the most horrifying part. My hands shake and my gut is in tangles as I write this 1 year later.
The on-call doctor strode into the room. When he came in I was in the middle of a contraction. I was focusing and breathing and concentrating on my husband like I had for a while. I didn’t really hear him at first, because he was speaking normally. But then he started to raise his voice. Louder and louder. It then started to filter through the contraction to me. He was yelling at us, telling us that he knew we had only come so that we could sue somebody. We were totally stunned.
He told me that he was going to insert an internal monitor right then and started moving my legs. I was still having my contraction which seemed like it would never end. It only got stronger. I was tensing up and that was making it worse.
I said, “No, wait!”
He said “I am going to do this. If you have a problem with it then we will go downstairs and get the lawyer and make you do it.”
My husband and midwife were telling him to wait, stop. He didn’t listen. He moved my legs and inserted the monitor. I was hysterical by this time. I didn’t hear what he was saying, but he yelled a few more times. He started walking out of the door. My husband followed him saying “Wait, Stop!” The doctor said “NO!” and marched out of the door.
My husband came back in and I was hysterical. We were all in shock. I was terrified of this man. I kept saying “He’s going to deliver my baby?! Oh my God! My baby, my baby! What do we do?” My midwife and husband were crying. The nurse was in the room for the entire thing. She was saying she didn’t know what happened with the doctor but that we would just keep going and have this baby. She was actually quite compassionate.
I must say that my entire labor was not painful. Incredibly intense. Requiring all my attention, yes. The only time that labor hurt for me was in the aftermath of the doctor’s assault, when I was screaming. I had a contraction and I started to completely panic. I started breathing rapidly and my eyes were darting around the room. I was sobbing. It was excruciating.
Finally my midwife looked into my eyes and told me that my baby needed me to be calm. My baby needed me to breathe slowly, to give him or her oxygen. I finally started to concentrate on breathing slowly and deeply. The contractions became bearable again.
Soon, my contractions changed a little bit. At the end, I would feel an uncontrollable urge to bear down. I actually didn’t understand what it was at first. Terri heard me grunting and her eyes got pretty wide and she had this tiny smile on her face. She asked “Are you pushing?” I said “I don’t know.”
Well, we decided to try to use the squat bar. Terri told me not to push with the urge, because I still had a bit of cervix left. She knew my body would do what it wanted anyway. I just shouldn’t try to help it along.
After a while, a doctor came in the room. She told me she was the new doctor on call. She was extremely kind to us. I was beyond relieved that I had a new doctor. She checked me and I was about 9 cm and the baby was still at +2 station. She left us to the squat bar and said she would be back later.
By this time I had been in labor almost 36 hours. The baby still had not come down. We decided to talk to the doctor about a C-Section. I was so incredibly disappointed. I couldn’t believe that I would be having another C-section. After all that I had planned and been through.
Once the decision was made, I was anxious to get the epidural. The anesthesiologist tried multiple times to get one into me. It was not taking. He tried one more time and this one worked everywhere except in my vagina. I felt every 9 cm contraction in my vagina!
We didn’t know the sex of the baby. One of the most important things to me in the birth was that Adam would get to tell me what the sex of the baby was. The doctor assured us that she would remind the nurses not to mention the sex when the baby was born.
I was still feeling every contraction in my vagina so they decided to give me a spinal. After that was in place and Adam was in the room, they began the surgery. I asked Adam to distract me so that I wouldn’t hear them talking about cutting me. We were getting excited about meeting our baby.
Finally they said the baby was about to be born. Adam stood up and saw our baby being born. I could hear the baby cry and I started to cry. Then Adam told me: We have a Mason! I started bawling. A baby boy! A brother for Garrett! I was so thrilled to have this blessing in my life.
They didn’t show me his face over the curtain like they did for Garrett. I could hear him crying. Adam went to see him. They let him cut the cord. I was anxious to see my new baby. I kept asking how he is. They kept saying how huge he is. They weighed him and he was 9 lbs 11 oz!
Adam brought him to me. I was in awe. He looked just like Garrett. Finally they had to take him to the nursery. Adam went with him. This was the difficult part. I didn’t want to be away from my baby for even a second.
After the surgery they took me to recovery and I only waited a minute or two when they brought me my beautiful baby boy, Mason Thomas ********. I undid his wrappings, placed him on my chest and latched him on to my breast. He had a beautiful latch. Daddy admired him with me for a few minutes and then Garrett came in. He loved seeing his brother. He was fascinated. I am sure he was a bit confused too. I had left the house that morning and then that afternoon he came to see me and I had a baby.
Although Mason’s birth was extremely traumatic for me, it was also quite empowering in a way. I was able to make the decisions that I felt were best for my baby and myself. Although the actions of that doctor will affect me forever, I hope that the legacy of this birth is the empowerment I received as a mother.
Mason Thomas ********, September 5th 2006, 9 lbs 11 oz, 22 inches