Guilt is punishment enough

[LisaS]

Why do people always say this when something tragic happens to someone and their family. Like if a child dies because the parents left it in the car, people say "well the guilt is punishment enough" (JUST AN EXAMPLE)...there are many situations where this can be said.

It's almost as if we don't want them to pay the price for their endangerment, stupidity or clear disregard for someone else.

[samiam]

I think the point is that the guilt is worse for many people than any sort of punishment.

For example, there was a story years ago about a boy who had killed another while driving drunk. The only thing the parents of the deceased boy had asked for was the other one to send them one dollar, once a month or week (I forget, it was awhile ago) for the rest of his life.

Being a parent I could understand asking for something like that versus anything other punishment the young boy could do. By having to send out that dollar once a week or month that boy will have to think about what he has done, is forced to, for the rest of his life.

[JenniferH]

I don't think that "guilt is enough" if punishment is warranted (i.e. purposely leaving the baby in the car because they couldn't be bothered to find a sitter, bring them in, etc.) vs. a true accident.

There really are tragic accidents in this world, but as a society we seem to have forgotten that. When there is no intent I have a harder time with punishment beyond the guilt already suffered.

[Ilovemonkeys]

I hear that all the time. Several babies have been injured and killed in my area over the alst several years b/c their dumbass parents did not have them in a carseat.
Not one of them has been charged, not even with a seatbelt or carseat violation.

I think they should all be charged and made shining examples to the rest of the idiots that insist their 2 yo is big enough to sit in the front seat with just the seat belt.

[Sashahomeschoolmama]

A little boy in Indianapolis just shot his sister and killed her with Dad's gun (http://www.wthr.com/Global/story.asp?S=8268183). Dad was arrested and charged with neglect (since he just left the semi-automatic weapon sitting on a bookcase with a bullet in the chamber). He was on the news bawling and squawling that he'd been punished enough, that the guilt would eat at him forever, and that they should let him out of jail.

No, guilt isn't always enough. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to put a gun away when you have preschoolers running around.

There are accidents and there is negligence. Guilt shouldn't keep one from having to deal with the latter.

[Prisca]

A little boy in Indianapolis just shot his sister and killed her with Dad's gun (http://www.wthr.com/Global/story.asp?S=8268183). Dad was arrested and charged with neglect (since he just left the semi-automatic weapon sitting on a bookcase with a bullet in the chamber). He was on the news bawling and squawling that he'd been punished enough, that the guilt would eat at him forever, and that they should let him out of jail.

No, guilt isn't always enough. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to put a gun away when you have preschoolers running around.

There are accidents and there is negligence. Guilt shouldn't keep one from having to deal with the latter.


I can't imagine feeling soooo guilty, yet thinking I didn't deserve some punishment. His neglect led to the death of one of his children, and the other will be haunted for the rest of his days.

[xobehs]

I hear that all the time. Several babies have been injured and killed in my area over the alst several years b/c their dumbass parents did not have them in a carseat.
Not one of them has been charged, not even with a seatbelt or carseat violation.

We just had a double fatality downstate here two weeks ago. The grandmother (driving) and mother (in passenger seat) were both charged. An 18 month old was in a car seat with the car's shoulder belt across the seat, the 3 year old was not restrained at all- both were killed when thrown from the vehicle when a tire blew and they lost control. @ adults were restrained and unharmed.

[steelady]

I have a different perspective.

I, personally, think those types of phrases are a way to separate out "good" people (who make bad decisions or mistakes) and "Bad" people who are criminals (and tacitally deserve jail).

It's meant to tell the perpetrator "hey, you did bad, but you are still a good person" rather than "you are a bad person who deserves to be punished".

I don't think the purpose is to objectify or de-humanize people in jail, but I do think that is the result.

[Sashahomeschoolmama]

I'm not sure, Steel. In the case of my example, it's a pretty fuzzy line between being a 'good' or 'bad' person. Why does someone living in an urban area need a semi-automatic weapon? Why leave it out with children around? And loaded? The sequence of events doesn't need a translator--it's unsurprising what happened.

Is such a person good or bad? Does that matter? Such a person was negligent, resulting in the death of a child (at the hands of another child, even), and therefore the charges fit the crime, IMO.