Katu26
07-09-2008, 08:46 PM
Hi Ladies,
I am new to the boards and wanted to introduce myself. My husband and I have a sweet 2 1/2 year old named Lawrence. We felt we were ready to exapnd our family and started TTC a second child 14 mos. ago. 6 mos. ago I got pregnant and we were overjoyed. I had no problems and was loving being pregnant. I had announced it to the world- even people I didn't know! The morning of my first screening ultrasound though, our dreams came to a screeching halt. There was an 11 week fetus with no heartbeat. The next 24 hours seemed like a nightmare. I visited two doctors and heard all about the possible reasons and choices of what to do etc. It was a blur. I was up all night in denial, crying and fearing there was some sort of mistake. The next morning though, my water broke, I started bleeding and was rushed to the hospital for a D+C. And that was it. We were told to just keep trying. And we have been...unsuccesfully. Each month brings a fresh wave of dissapointment. The hardest parts of grieving for me have been dealing with my anger towards God, being at work (I am a physician and I just recently stopped delivering babies- it has been hard being around so many pregnant women- some who don't want their pregnancies) and unsuccesfully trying to conceive again (I have been fearing maybe something went wrong with my D+C). Anyway, obviously it has been hard to put into words, but it is helpful to have a place to come where others understand.
I am new to the boards and wanted to introduce myself. My husband and I have a sweet 2 1/2 year old named Lawrence. We felt we were ready to exapnd our family and started TTC a second child 14 mos. ago. 6 mos. ago I got pregnant and we were overjoyed. I had no problems and was loving being pregnant. I had announced it to the world- even people I didn't know! The morning of my first screening ultrasound though, our dreams came to a screeching halt. There was an 11 week fetus with no heartbeat. The next 24 hours seemed like a nightmare. I visited two doctors and heard all about the possible reasons and choices of what to do etc. It was a blur. I was up all night in denial, crying and fearing there was some sort of mistake. The next morning though, my water broke, I started bleeding and was rushed to the hospital for a D+C. And that was it. We were told to just keep trying. And we have been...unsuccesfully. Each month brings a fresh wave of dissapointment. The hardest parts of grieving for me have been dealing with my anger towards God, being at work (I am a physician and I just recently stopped delivering babies- it has been hard being around so many pregnant women- some who don't want their pregnancies) and unsuccesfully trying to conceive again (I have been fearing maybe something went wrong with my D+C). Anyway, obviously it has been hard to put into words, but it is helpful to have a place to come where others understand.