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Mary_Mary
07-15-2008, 10:09 PM
If your parent dies suddenly:

Don't forget to pack lots of underwear for yourself. Overestimate your needs.

Take dress clothes for several different temperatures...not just how the weather is the day you leave.

Take plenty of 'regular' clothes too.

If someone offers to help with your kids accept the offer immediately. You'll need the help.

Don't worry if you don't cry immediately...the tears will come.

When you're packing your stuff in your daze of disbelief, it's best to just pretend that you've just taken a shower and go through the motions of getting ready to go somewhere. Put everything you touch into your bag. You're less likely to forget things like contact solution and your toothbrush that way.

Remember to take a razor.

If you have time before you CAN leave, start going through your pictures and find ones with that parent in them and take them along.

If your parents have a safe, make SURE someone else knows how to open it.

Seriously consider writing something to be read at the funeral...even if you KNOW you won't be able to read it, you can always have someone else do it for you.



My father died last Wednesday evening, July 9. He'd had no health problems whatsoever. He was a man who faithfully got his physical every year and had bloodwork done and if there was ANY little thing that the doctor said he should change he changed it.

He'd spent the whole day with friends and family. He'd attended a funeral in the morning with my sister (my mom was out of town for the last four days before he died). The funeral was for my aunts mother-in-law, who was also a member of my parents church.

Then he went home and changed his clothes and my sister helped him arrange some flowers to take to antoher funeral home because the wife of one of his lifelong friends had died. He saw many friends there as well.

After that he went back to his house and my sister was there with her kids and they were swimming in the pool. Dad and my sister were weeding around the pool, working on getting ready for a family reunion that my parents were to host on Saturday.

My sister was sitting on the ground weeding and my dad was using a hoe just behind her. He fell down. My sister thought he had tripped but when he didn't respond she started CPR immediately. Her son (17) called 9-1-1, then came out and helped with CPR.

The ambulance people shocked him with the defibrilator but nothing helped. After over 40 minutes of CPR they pronounced him dead.

We are taking as much comfort as we can from the fact that this is the way he always said he wanted to go. His sister had died of cancer just last July and he didn't want to go like that. His last day was filled with family and friends. I'm so glad that my sister was with him...she has done CPR before in the course of her work...and so she did everything she could for him from the very first second. We didn't have to find him lying there and wonder how long he'd been down or if he suffered at all.

He was an active man...he was never one to sit still. He always had some project or another he was working on. He was always there to help my sister and I with things that needed fixed.

He was kind of quiet, but a big goofball too. He hugged everyone a lot. He loved to nibble on little kids ears.

He was involved with many, many activities. Bowling, hunter safety, the fair, he was a clerk at the local hay auction, the conservation club, Habitat for Humanity, and the list goes on and on.

He was not the type to sit home and complain that his kids didn't call often enough...on the contrary, we were lucky to catch him at home unless it was 7:00am. More than once, when I needed to ask him something on a Monday evening, I knew I had to call the bowling alley because that's where he would be.

He read a lot too. He was a fan of the Little House books, and of Torey Hayden as well.

I just don't know how we're going to cope without him. My husband said, "Whenever I needed something I would always call YOUR dad before I'd call my own, and my own dad is closer geographically."

I worry about how my mom is going to cope. Even though they were both busy with their own activities, they did a LOT of stuff together too.

My mom and dad were members of the Farm Bureau council. There were quite a few couples in the group, but over the years others dropped out. But the core group of about five couples have been meeting on a monthly basis for the past 45 years or so. You don't find that too often. They had their regular meetings and also got together on New Years Eve and Halloween and stuff.

I would never, not in a hundred years, have thought that it would be MY dad who was the first of that group to die. Never.

I worry for my mom...I worry a lot. Fortunately she is very active herself and involved in many different things. But when she starts coming home to an empty house...I worry how she's going to cope.

And my poor sister keeps replaying things in her mind and wondering if there was something she could have done differently.

And my nephews and my niece...they were there. My 17 year old nephew helped with CPR. My 15 year old niece kept my younger nephews (9 and 7) busy while all this was going on. Got them out of the pool, kept them safe, kept them occupied.

I wasn't able to get there until about 4 hours after everything happened. They stayed at the hospital until I got there so I could see dad before they took him away.

When I kissed him he was already cold. It just wasn't right for him to be cold.

Mary_Mary
07-15-2008, 10:11 PM
Oh, and don't forget your pump. Especially if your child won't be with you again immediately. (Fortunately this is something I DID remember. It was just easier to go to moms (two hours away) and leave the girls at home with my husband at first as my moms house isn't set up well for guests.)

Carolina
07-15-2008, 10:13 PM
I'm so sorry. How sad!!! It must be very hard. :(

WalkingTittyBar
07-15-2008, 10:14 PM
I am so, so sorry. I dread the day I ever have to deal with losing a parent.

Tiffers
07-15-2008, 10:15 PM
Oh hun, I'm so very, very sorry. You're in my thoughts and prayers, your family as well.

How are you doing?

cc1003
07-15-2008, 10:20 PM
I am so sorry.

Mary_Mary
07-15-2008, 10:24 PM
I'm coping relatively well. I know that I'm going to spend months...maybe years...crying at odd moments.

He was so active that even when I was at moms in the days after his death it was easy to just feel that he was off doing something. Being at mom and dads and dad NOT being there was almost the norm, rather than the exception. I think that the full impact won't hit me until Thanksgiving...that will be the first holiday that would be one of those days that he was ALWAYS there for. That and Christmas.

Those days are going to be hard.

Tiffers
07-15-2008, 10:27 PM
(((hugs)))

I just can't say it enough, how sorry I am for your loss. I can't imagine how hard this must be. My heart goes out to you.

mags
07-15-2008, 10:32 PM
I am so sorry for your loss. He sounds like a great man. ((((HUGS)))))

billysmom
07-15-2008, 10:33 PM
I'm so sorry. I hope that your are comforted by your memories. I can't imagine what it's like to lose a parent.

alejorge
07-15-2008, 10:36 PM
I am soo sorry. You will be in my thoughts and your family.

QuiltyConscience
07-15-2008, 10:49 PM
I'm, so sorry. Sounds like he was a very wonderful man. My heart goes out to you.

JenniferH
07-15-2008, 10:51 PM
I'm so sorry.

That exprience of the phone ringing and thinking, "Hey, maybe it is grandma!" still hits me once in awhile and it has been five years since she died. You are going to have an entire year of "firsts". They will all be hard.

Give yourself the space to grieve.

Pamire
07-15-2008, 10:52 PM
I am so sorry for your loss. He sounds as though he was a wonderful father. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.

samiam
07-15-2008, 10:58 PM
I'm sorry. I am glad he went peacefully though and he was able to spend his last day around family and friends. I saw my great aunt suffer through her last year of life and I would have given anything to make it stop. The firsts are awfully hard but remember all the good times and the way he was. No matter what you won't forget that. On some level I still think my aunt is 'around'. At odd times I almost feel her peacefullness around me. She was a very religious woman but more than that she was a true saint if I ever knew one.

I am so sorry for your loss. He sounds like he was an incredible guy.

tabatha
07-15-2008, 11:01 PM
I am soooo sorry to hear of the loss of such a wonderful man, you dad. You are in my thoughts.

FrznPolarAngel
07-15-2008, 11:04 PM
You have my deepest condolences. It is very rough to lose a parent suddenly. My mother passed away 2 weeks after being admitted for difficulty in breathing.

nelsonwife
07-15-2008, 11:05 PM
I'm so very very sorry for you and your family.

I too, just lost my father 4 months ago....and this post brought much needed tears that I haven't shed since the actual day he died.


I'm so sorry.


I feel so bad for your sister for having to be the "one" that did cpr, and now wondering with the what--ifs'.

And your mom, I'm so sad for her. The coming home to an empty house has to be the most hardest I can imagine for a spouse losing their L/O.

And certainly, not the least, but lastly....I feel soooooo bad for you, Mary mary.

Please feel free to pm anytime. I'm always a listening ear.

Mocosita
07-15-2008, 11:07 PM
My deepest condolences to you and your family. It has been a great loss, of a father that was loved deeply and a wonderful man.:hug::hug:

Thoughts and prayers for your family and especially your mom!

We lost MIL almost two years ago (ds was conceived shortly thereafter) and we think about her everyday. Wondering how she would react to ds, what she would say. FIL is still trying to find purpose in his now empty life. I hope your mom finds comfort and strength within your family!

ann02
07-15-2008, 11:22 PM
I am so sorry for your loss. I will keep you and your family in my prayers.

mommyof2sons
07-15-2008, 11:36 PM
I am sorry for your loss!! :(

Nipple_nectar
07-15-2008, 11:42 PM
What a loving tribute {{{hugs}}} It sounds like you were blessed with a very special relationship with your dad, I'm sorry things are so difficult for you right now.

I will say a prayer for you, hoping that you can find the strength and courage you need for the path ahead of you:(

JudyJudyJudy
07-16-2008, 02:55 AM
I'm so very sorry. :( I'm really glad you have good memories; that's what will get you through this. :hug:

Babyhellfire
07-16-2008, 03:59 AM
:( I am so sorry

_MrsC_
07-16-2008, 04:09 AM
I'm sorry.

TaraBear
07-16-2008, 07:23 AM
I am so sorry, it's never ever easy losing a parent suddenly...trust me I know. No matter what age you are or they are. Your family with my in my thoughts. Take care of yourself and don't forget it's ok to cry.

Wolverine
07-16-2008, 07:34 AM
I am so sorry. I don't know what else to say. Unexcepted losses are so hard.

Ultramom
07-16-2008, 07:39 AM
I'm so sorry. Your dad sounds like a wonderful man.

cream_city
07-16-2008, 07:41 AM
((hugs))

Tiffearni
07-16-2008, 08:00 AM
I'm so sorry for your loss. (((HUGS)))) He sounds like he was an amazing man.

Olianna
07-16-2008, 08:24 AM
I am soooo... sorry. Your post has me in tears. My mom died in February and I miss her so very, very much. Your father sounds as if he was a wonderful man. My mom was the same, just the kindest most gentle soul. I'm sure your father will be missed by many.

I'm so sorry. May you and your family find peace at this very difficult time.

kohlby
07-16-2008, 08:35 AM
I'm so sorry for your loss Mary. {{{HUGS}}}

still_me
07-16-2008, 08:35 AM
I am so sorry. You and your family will be in my prayers.

3girls2luv
07-16-2008, 08:59 AM
:hug:I am so so sorry. I lost my dad in August and I still cry at odd moments. My heart aches for you and your family.

whitnessforhim
07-16-2008, 09:07 AM
I am so sorry for your loss Mary!! I can only imagine what you might be going through. My prayers are with you and your family.

Still_Tbog
07-16-2008, 09:10 AM
I am so sorry.

Crabbie
07-16-2008, 11:15 AM
{{{Mary}}}

J-A-N-E
07-16-2008, 11:22 AM
I am so sorry for your loss. My father is in the final stage of cancer..I can only imagine right now the grief and loss you are feeling.

xobehs
07-16-2008, 11:44 AM
I am so very very sorry.

Sassafras
07-16-2008, 12:02 PM
http://i3.photobucket.com/albums/y60/pigwedgeon/Picture047.jpg

Sassy

madelsmama
07-16-2008, 12:29 PM
I am so very sorry. I can't imagine your sorrow.

Suzette
07-16-2008, 12:54 PM
I am so sorry. Please know you are in my thoughts.

Nursh
07-16-2008, 12:54 PM
I am so very sorry.

Darcy_
07-16-2008, 12:58 PM
I am so sorry for your loss.

HammBugga
07-16-2008, 01:00 PM
:( i am sorry

Whitney
07-16-2008, 01:56 PM
I am so sorry for your loss. He sounds like a great man. I will have you and your family in my thoughts and prayers.

smoochy12
07-16-2008, 02:01 PM
i am so sorry. he sounds like he was a gentle soul and will be greatly missed. and my heart goes out to your sister and her kids too. it is not a good memory to harbour. i watched my nan have a stroke at my parents house in november, and ven though she died a few days later in the hospital, i will never forget the chair, the timing, the lighting, the feeling of that moment. :(

i'm sending peace in the coming difficult months.

JulieMae
07-16-2008, 03:15 PM
I'm so sorry.

bebeisa
07-16-2008, 03:39 PM
I am very sorry for your loss.

DiscoPanda
07-17-2008, 08:01 AM
I am so sorry for your loss.

Teri
07-17-2008, 01:39 PM
I'm so sorry for your loss.

Mary_Mary
07-20-2008, 07:33 AM
Thank you all for your good thoughts.

I went up to visit my mom Friday and spent the night and stayed most of the day Saturday. My sister and some other friends of my nieces and nephews came to swim too.

Mom's doing relatively well. Fortunately she had a lot of stuff scheduled already for this summer...she is an accredited flower judge...and so she's been going ahead and judging the fairs she was committed to. The first one she had someone drive her, the second one she drove herself, at least to meet up with someone she was going to ride with the rest of the way.

Perhaps if she had not had the events already scheduled she wouldn't have felt up to scheduling them, but with that already done all she has to do is follow through, which takes a lot less effort in situations like this.

Mom has had so much company that she says she is ready to just be alone and feel sorry for herself. That would worry me more if I didn't know that she's got plenty to keep her busy. Her friends from church and garden club have been visiting her regularly and keeping her fed and stuff. I know that, given her schedule, even if she indulges in a major bout of self-pity...and who can blame her for that...she's not going to be able to descend too low into the well of self-pity because she has things to do.

Naturally though, things around their house are in constant need of attention and I guess that replacing some of the water supply pipes out by the barn was something on dad's 'to-do' short list. They started springing leaks the other day and so my sister...who is very much like my dad about just going about a job as if you know what you're doing...rooted through all of dad's pipes and elbows and shut-off valves and managed to replace the leaky stuff so that mom would have water in the house again.

It was funny. I spent most of yesterday helping my sister and I said that I felt like I'd assumed the role of my sister and my sister had, of course, assumed the role of my dad.

We're all taking comfort from the fact that dad died exactly the way he always said he wanted to go. Mom is even taking a lot comfort from that.

The point I've made is that, even though WE feel that he was taken in an untimely manner, perhaps he really DID live just exactly the right amount of time. No one knows what the future holds. His dad died of prostate cancer, his younger sister of cancer, his mom suffered from Alzheimers. All horrible ways to go.

For all we know perhaps he was on the verge of a cancer diagnosis, or even on the verge of dementia. Honestly, we all did worry slightly about dad and Alzheimers and I think that his mom must have been near his age when she began showing unmistakable signs of dementia. Perhaps that is the road he was destined to go down and by dying NOW we all remember him alert and active and 'with it' rather than ravaged by that dread disease.

So I've convinced myself that this was the right way for him to go...and more importantly...the right time as well. Rough on all of us...no little nudge that we needed to start depending more on ourselves and less on him...we got shoved right straight off the cliff in that respect...but the way HE wanted to go, quick and painless.

It still doesn't seem overly weird to be at mom's without dad there. I know it's hardest for mom at night, but she is keeping all of the pictures of dad by the bed and when she goes to bed at night she looks through them until she falls asleep.

For the rest of us though...he was involved in so much stuff that you never knew when he would be home so it's not as if visiting mom accentuates that he's not there.

Stella
07-20-2008, 09:37 AM
I'm so sorry, Mary. I wish you all peace.

Sams3Boys
07-20-2008, 10:21 AM
I am so sorry.

Justicedog
07-20-2008, 02:39 PM
I'm sorry and will keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers. He sounds like he was a great man, as are your niece and nephew.

Bama_5
07-20-2008, 11:18 PM
Mary Mary,

My thoughts have been with you and yours these past few days. Someone has already said what came to my mind as I read your post. The first year has some surprising hits. A year full of firsts. There will be times when you expect the sadness but might be shocked as to the depth; other times, it hits you out of the blue.

Vent here when you need it. Things do get better. Time does not make one forget but helps us accept and move on most of the time.

Thinking of You and hope you didn't mind me reviving this thread to say so instead of a PM

Bama

Bellaelle
07-20-2008, 11:38 PM
I am so very sorry. I just cannot imagine the sorrow you must feel. I adore my father and the thought of losing him makes me ill.

I wish you all strength in this difficult time.

Earthmama
07-20-2008, 11:49 PM
My deepest empathy. I wish you peace.

I think your assessment of the alternatives to his passing like he did are very insightful and I hope they help you find your peace. It does sound like a pleasant path out - but I feel for your sister and her children. I can't imagine.