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View Full Version : My Birth Story. My First Baby.


Lactavist_Leslie
08-24-2008, 05:58 PM
Like any other first time mom, I had no idea what to expect when it came to labor. On a Monday morning I woke up with some mild back cramping, similar to what I would feel before an onset of my period. I remember wondering if this was the beginning, so I called my best friend Erika and she showed up at my apartment about 11a.m. and off to the hospital we went. This was the beginning of many trips until I went in to active labor. The first nurse to see me was a kind lady who did a vaginal exam and let me know I was indeed in the beginning of labor. I was experiencing contractions and dilated 3cm. I wouldn't be admitted until I was dilated to 4. SO I went home. My husband had just left to Tuscon for the week to attend a training so when he rushed home that night we went back to the hospital to get an update on my progress. This time the nurse was horrible at doing a vaginal exam. It HURT! I was still only 3 and my contractions were irregular. When they asked me what I wanted to do for pain I let them know I was going to go naturally. My nurse responded by telling me I wasn't prepared for natural labor. I was in shock with her answer and just didn't say anything because I couldn't believe she said that. I mean what did women do before the advent of pain medicated labor? C'mon lady is what I thought.

I went home and tried to sleep. At around 3am I couldn't any longer and my mom & I went for a walk around the apartment complex. My contractions were getting stronger, not exactly more painful, just uncomfortable. At around 6am we went back to the hospital. I was still 3cm. This time the nurse on shift smirks when I answer that I want a natural birth to her pain medication question. I was baffled at the lack of support for a womens decision in HER OWN birth plan.

I went home again. I hadn't slept. Noon comes around I go back to the hospital. Nurse tells me again I am not ready to have a natural birth because she tried and it didn't happen. Great Advice huh? Also I didn't go to a childbirth class, so what did I know? I didn't realize women had been doing this since the beginning of time without classes. What did they do then?

They sent me home after giving me an Ambien and said if I truly was in labor I wouldn't be able to sleep.

I couldn't sleep, I should've paid attention to that red flag in my mind at that point and stayed home.

4 o'clock rolls around. The contractions are pretty intense but I was still fine. Nothing like that nurse in the hospital said they would be. So I get to the point where I think I'm pretty close and if I wasn't 4 by now I was going to pass out from exhaustion.

I go back to the hospital. Now I can't talk through a contraction. The nurse has the nerve in this time to ask me, "Are you done feeling what natural labor feels like?" I was astonished. I couldn't think straight in a time like this, so I look over to my mother who was with me (my husband was rushing to come from Tuscon) and the nurse butts in, "She's not the one lying in that bed, you are, you need to make the decision!" I thought I already had, telling the nurses when they checked me in to triage that I didn't want pain medication. She proceeds, "What? Do you see women who have had natural labor walking around with gold stars on their foreheads?"

I was livid but because of my contractions I couldn't respond. I shouldn't have had to deal with that. I asked her if I was 4cm yet, she shook her head no. In disbelief I asked, "I'm still only 3?" and she left the room. Than she came back and said have you decided? (about the epidural) Than she told me I was only 6cm. I figured this was the extent of my pain tolerance and submitted to the epidural because I had no idea how long it would take to get me to 10. Within minutes the anesthesiologist was in administering the epidural. While he was injecting the medication he was chatting with the nurse about how this was a special epidural because I was so far dilated. The nurse asked how dilated I was and he said 9cm. I WAS SHOCKED. No other vaginal exam had been done except for the one by the nurse who told me I was only 6. I filed a complaint with the hospital because she had lied to me. I couldn't speak during a contraction because I was already in transition and ready to push. I wasn't informed of the risks of an epidural at such an advanced stage of labor either.

Than I had to deal with a pediatrician (which I changed) who didn't know a thing about breastfeeding, told me I had no milk and sent me home with enough formula to last me a month.

I was depressed.

Thankfully I didn't give up and went on a mission to educate myself and now am successfully exclusively breastfeeding my 4 1/2 mo old. I know there are plenty of women out there who believed what they were told and gave up. I find this to be very sad and have a deep need to change this. Point being, hospitals are not respecting women's right and decisions!

Shaunsmom
08-24-2008, 07:18 PM
Good for you to have continued to successfully nurse your baby.

Your story is appalling to read (how the staff was to you)...however, I personally had nothing good to say about the staff and/or hospital I had to deliver our youngest at.

I was 36 weeks pg. when I drove myself in to get checked for what I thought was false labor. I had to go to St. V's when I wanted to go to St. M's. St. V's has the only NICU in the area.

Is it too late to file a formal complaint (or something along those lines) to the hospital that you delivered at?

Thank you for posting. I hope you continue to post on this site. I really enjoy reading and posting since I found this site earlier this year.

Darcy_
08-24-2008, 11:23 PM
I am so sorry for your lack of support in the hospital. (((hugs)))

Joyto5
08-26-2008, 09:34 AM
(((HUGS))) I'm so sorry that happened to you! I fought with my nursing staff as well. It was my 3rd baby, first hospital birth. The nurses were all so shocked at how alert and awake my baby was after the birth. They are now the reason I fight with our Midwives in our state to keep home birth legal!

Great Job at education yourself and striving to nursing your baby!

jewels
08-27-2008, 04:31 PM
Wow, I'm sorry that happen to you that must have been really difficult to have those nurses not support you for a natural birth and that the one was untruthful to you. It's amazing that you work through a difficult nursing experience too. I think it's great that you filed a complaint with the hospital. Being a Birth Doula, I always encourage mothers to write letters and file complaints or change won't happen. Congratulate yourself, you're an incredible strong woman and mother. I'm glad you're able to just your enjoying your baby, now.