A story, if you're interested

[MissionaryMomma]

Tomorrow is my birthday. I haven't hosted company in quite some time, so we invited some people over. The one man couldn't come because his car is under warranty and he's close to the oil change mileage with no money to spend on it. The other coupld said they'd come, but she recently found out she's expecting and has a Dr appointment that day. Bummer.

So today, some men (Turkish) came to work on the house we are watching for a friend. I cooked and baked all day (because I've fallen in LOVE with her kitchen). At supper time I asked dh if he wanted to have them men come in and eat. He asked and they accepted. This was my first time of truly hosting a meal (I've had people over for coffee and cookies and such). Anyway, I got nervous because I wanted to follow their customs.

I told the children that they would be served after the men were finished. Then I set the table for the three men and dh. I set out fresh bread, a tomato/pasta dish with cheese, and a bowl of pickled veggies. They sat down and as custom, I served their plates. When I left the room to check on the kids, they opened their hands, palms up, and prayed all at the same time. Then they ate. I reveived many compliments, but mostly on my pickled veggies. I sat down and drank my green smoothie and talked with them all. They ate to the full and then I gave them a sticky bun. They were almost too full to eat it, but did anyway. They gave their thanks.

Near the end of the meal, the one man (head of the crew) asked if we could call our American friend (in America now to see his Dad for the last time) so he could talk with him about the work on his house. I called and got our friend on the line and handed the phone to the man. He spoke, for the first time in his life, to someone in America. The others listened intently. They joked around a bit, talked a bit, and then turned emotional near the end. Love filled the room. He sent greetings of peace to our friend and his family. He sent greetings of peace from the churches. He also told of his newborn baby boy. He nearly cried, but held it together. It was a precious moment that dh and I got to share.

Afterward, they asked questions about America. We answered to the best of our ability (language wise). One man asked dh if there were fruit trees there and how many times per season they fruited. Dh didn't catch all that and only heard the word for "tree" which is also the word for "wood". He dove into telling him about gas furnaces and not many people nowadays using wood. To them it sounded like he was saying that America didn't have any trees. Y'all should have heard them laughing. I caught on and told dh what the man was asking. We all had a good laugh.

It was a fabulous time around the table and I feel that I succeeded in my first time of hosting a different culture at supper time.

Tomorrow I'll tell the story of how his wife thinks I'm a prophetess. LOL!

[Teresa64]

That is so cool. I wish I had the oppurtunity to live and experience another culture!!!!

[Teresa64]

Happy Early Birthday!!!

[Sputterduck]

That is so sweet. What a wonderful experience!

Although, *why* if you cooked so much good food were you drinking a green smoothie??

I want to hear the prophetess story!

And Happy Birthday tomorrow!!!

[jessiehannan]

Happy early Birthday! It sounds like even if your plans wren't followed through, that you had a wonderful time anyway.

[The_Market]

That reminds me of the time we had the jucie girls over for Christmas dinner when we lived in Korea.

Tomorrow I'll tell the story of how his wife thinks I'm a prophetess.
How 'bout you just tell us now. I love hearing about true to life cultural interaction.

[JudyJudyJudy]

That's really neat. Happy Birthday!

[Earthmama]

Awesome story! Thanks for sharing & happy birthday!!!

[steelady]

Happy Birthday, Lady!!!!!!

May you have many, many, many, many, many more.

The world needs more yous.

[MissionaryMomma]

I had no time to tell the prophetess story last night. Wanted to smooch up on dh instead.

Okay, here's the story, albeit long:

Last Christmas, we were walking out of our gate to get into our van to go to a party at the home of another missionary friend. We were all dressed up and in our best coats. A little old woman I had seen before (she used to pick through the scraps at the meat market that they throw out for the dogs) came over to me and asked something of me. My language skills were even more lacking then than they are now and I didn't understand her. It didn't take long before I understood that she was cold and had no coat. She asked if I had something she could wear. I ran up to our storage room and found her something. She hugged me and walked toward the meat factory.

A week later, a winter storm hit and I didn't see her come around. I was worried that she had passed. Every time the church bells rang, I thought of her.

Then in March, she came by again. I was so happy to see her. I ran out and hugged her and asked how she'd been. She said she had been ill. I fed her and we talked. She didn't want a handout and asked if she could come and help me with the gardening for a bit of money. I agreed.

She came with her hoe in hand and weeded my flower beds. I had her rest every so often and we'd talk. She told me that she had been a widow for 25 years. Her daughter was also a widow. Her ganddaughter just had a baby. They were flat busted broke and she asked if I had some clothes or a blanket for the baby. I didn't. My baby is 4. I told her I'd see what I could do.

Then I remembered the box of yarn I was sent for Christmas. It had been nearly 15 years since I'd picked up a hook, but I tried it out anyway. I was just experimenting with different stitches, not really knowing what I was doing. I was determined to crochet a hat and blanket. I didn't know the sex of the baby, but I'd been told that colors don't matter here. They wear whatever they have. You can tell it's a girl by the earrings.

So I made a blue striped blanket with matching hat. I waited for her to come back. She didn't come. I worried about her again. She hadn't told me where she lived and I couldn't find her. A month later, she came back to the gate. She said she had been ill again but would like to come back to work with me on Friday. I said she could come back. I forgot to give her the blanket and hat. She never came back and I haven't seen her since. I cried about it.

A couple months went by and there laid that blanket and hat. I wasn't sure what to do with it. I thought I'd wait and hear of someone expecting and I'd give it. It wasn't long and I heard that the man's (the crew chief from the above story) wife was expecting. They are older and have grandchildren. It was completely unexpected. They have 4 grown girls. I thought I'd gift wrap it up and send it to her through a friend.

My friend (the lady whose house I am watching----whose kitchen I LOVE!) took the gift bag to church with her. She took her to the side and handing it to her, told her that it was a gift from me. She raised an eyebrown. She didn't know me well and wondered why I would be sending her a gift.

She slowly peeked in the bag. When she caught sight of what it was, she started screaming. Her friend came running and looked in the bag. She started screaming. My friend had no idea what made them so excited. They had seen crocheted afghans before, surely. When the screaming subsided, my friend asked what was so exciting.

She told her that it was because the colors were blue. I must have been prophesying that her baby was going to be a boy. She and her husband had dreamed of having a boy, since they already had four girls. Surely, it was a sign.

I saw her at a wedding this summer and she thanked me for the gift. I asked her due date and it was October. I let her know that she MUST have him on my birthday. She and I laughed together.

She didn't have her baby on my birthday, but it was a boy.

Next time I give out crochets, I'll be a LOT more careful about the color. LOL!

[MissionaryMomma]

Although, *why* if you cooked so much good food were you drinking a green smoothie??


HA! Yes, the green smoothies. I've been turned on to them and find them to be extremely satisfying.

Also, it's not custom for the woman to sit and eat at that time. She is to serve. I did sit and talk, smoothie in hand, but I didn't eat.

When we are served in the home of a national, no one from the host family eats with us. They serve us and sit and talk with us while we eat.

And when they ask if you want more, be sure to shake your head properly or they will be feeding you until you blow up. Here, shaking the head is yes and nodding the head is no.

[MissionaryMomma]

Bump for The Market

[still_me]

:) That is so cool. Thank you for sharing those stories with us. Happy Birthday!!

[MissionaryMomma]

Still me, I LOVE your siggy!

[JudyJudyJudy]

MM, what a neat story!

I hate that you haven't seen the elderly woman again. :(

[MissionaryMomma]

Me too, Judy. I don't even know her name. :(

Around these part, the church bells ring when there has been a death. They rang often this past winter. I'm sorry to say it, but I think she's gone. I wish I had known where she lived so I could help the granddaughter and great grandchild. Perhaps that will work out some day and they will come find me.

[Tweet]

I love both stories :)

I'm feeling very envious of your life right now, MM. How neat that must be.

[JudyJudyJudy]

Around these part, the church bells ring when there has been a death. They rang often this past winter. I'm sorry to say it, but I think she's gone. I wish I had known where she lived so I could help the granddaughter and great grandchild. Perhaps that will work out some day and they will come find me.That's so sad. :(

I know this isn't the same, but in the nursing home where my mother is, there was a 96yo woman. She looked great for her age and seemed to have a good mind. The first and only time I ever met her, she was sitting in the hall in her wheelchair. She told me she was cold, and she asked me if I could help her get into bed. I looked around for a nurse or aide, but I didn't see anyone. I even sent my nephew and son to see if they could get someone to help, but no one ever came.

Finally, I decided to help her anyway. She was really light, so it wasn't as difficult to get her into the bed as I had feared. I got her covered up and tucked in and asked her if she was okay. She said gratefully, "Oh, yes. You're an angel."

I worried about that woman so much. I was so afraid that she'd be cold and that no one would help her. A couple of weeks later I heard that she died, and I wondered if she had been cold. :(

[MissionaryMomma]

It has its days, Tweet. Some days I'm thrilled that I came. Other days, I look to heaven and say, "I quit". The languages can be very frustrating. I had an opportunity to go to the University and take a eight month course, and become fluent in that time. I was thrilled, until they told me the hours. It was 6 days a week, 7 hrs a day--plus homework. Had I been without 5 children, I'd have jumped at it. But class started before I had to take the kids to school and ended after the kids were out of school for the day. Plus, the youngest isn't in school. Dh is very involved in the churches and the feedings that he couldn't manage the kids schedules alone. It didn't work out and I was bummed.

However, I've learned since then that languages are best learned when sitting in someone's kitchen, over a cup of coffee and some cookies. They can't speak English, so if you want to talk to them, you must do it in their language. They are very patient, for the most part. Sometimes, though, when I tell them that I can't understand, they just repeat the same words, but slower. LOL!

Another thing to adjust to is that they are a very curious people (I would say nosey). Everyday we send our son down to our house with our trash (there is a community dumpster by our house) so that he can put it in the dumpster and feed our cats all in one trip. Yesterday 2 different neighbors came over to scold me for not letting my son take our trash to the center (the opposite direction), where they said the dumpster was closer. When we told them that there was indeed a dumpster by our house, they argued that there wasn't. Sometimes you have to smile and say "Thank you. Have a nice day." instead of debating the issue.

Also, if you buy something, someone will ask you how much you paid for it and press the issue. They are very open about fininces, whereas we aren't. Also, they will ask where you live. They don't want to visit or anything. They just need to know. If you tell them that you live "near" a small city, they will press the matter and find out what village.

They call us Englishmen. They call any white, English speaker an Englishman---including the man in our village from South Africa.

Some of their foods are hard to take as well. I love the sarma and the musaka (how on earth do you spell that in English? LOL). I don't like the gelled soups, chicken claw soups, cow stomach soups, etc. I also find that they use way too much oil and way too much salt.

Just so that I'm not confusing anyone, I'm mostly talking about the village Turks here.

[MissionaryMomma]

Judy, that's so sad. My husband and I used to go to the nursing homes in our area in MI and sing with them, pray with them, etc. Eventually I had to stop going. Inside I was struggling so much with losing them. I cried all the time. Dh continued to go and see them. They were always so happy that he was there.

[JudyJudyJudy]

MM, you should compile your stories for a book.

[MissionaryMomma]

I'm writing a book. It's a journal of sorts. I have 35 or so chapters/entries. I may post a chapter or 2, if I get up the guts.

[JudyJudyJudy]

I'd love to read it. If you're not comfortable posting it here, but you're okay with my reading it, you can PM me.

[MissionaryMomma]

[Nervously Biting My Nails] Um, I'll think about it. I would like an outsider's perspective, but it's very *religious*.

[MissionaryMomma]

"Outsider" was of course used respectfully. I didn't mean anything at all by it.

[JudyJudyJudy]

You didn't hurt my feelings. I'm an odd bird. I can appreciate religious writing as long as it doesn't put down my kind.

[MissionaryMomma]

I call myself an odd duck. LOL!

I've been asked to put the book into print for ladies missionary groups. I'm not sure I will, however, because some of the emotions in the book are very raw and real to me. I don't want to be condemned for them by the Baptist legalists. I'm praying on it. I don't want to take out those parts for them because that would make me a phony. It's perplexing to me.

[MissionaryMomma]

By *religious*, I mean my own personal relationship with Christ. There is very little in there that is theological or commentary-like. There is one chapter, though, that denounces legalism. Let me see if I can find that one....

[MissionaryMomma]

Now I'm gonna go get a shower and pretend I didn't just PM you those entries. LOL! I'm a nervous odd duck.

Oh, I forgot to tell you that there is a picture that goes with each entry. The first one is of my house. The second is of that washing machine.

[hidesome]

Did I tell you that you are my new hero? I'm glad people like you exist on our tiny planet.

[JudyJudyJudy]

Now I'm gonna go get a shower and pretend I didn't just PM you those entries. LOL! I'm a nervous odd duck.

Oh, I forgot to tell you that there is a picture that goes with each entry. The first one is of my house. The second is of that washing machine.
That's awesome. When I was reading it, I was thinking you should have some pictures!

As I said in the PM, don't be nervous. You have talent and a great topic. You're a wonderful, sincere person. Continue to be yourself in your writing; don't be concerned about writing for others right now. Write for yourself, and that will be more than good enough for others.

[MissionaryMomma]

Insert blush smiley here

[JudyJudyJudy]

Did I tell you that you are my new hero? I'm glad people like you exist on our tiny planet.
I agree. :)

[MissionaryMomma]

Did I ever tell y'all that I'm a big ol' softy. I'm a gushy mess of tears right now. My newly applied mascara is running. Thanks, y'all, for making me feel special.

[JudyJudyJudy]

:)

[MissionaryMomma]

Forgot to tell what I got for my birthday.

Two of the kids spent last week's allowance on chocolate (one was a hollow Santa LOL!). The other kids didn't feel the need to spend anything. Dh gave me a watch (silver with a dark blue face).

[JudyJudyJudy]

Cool presents! :D

[Crabbie]

Happy birthday and thanks for sharin your stories.