Have you talked with your children about homosexuality?

[Tweet]

??

DD1 ,6, recently asked some questions..like, is it ok for girls to think other girls are cute and if it's ok to be in love with them. I just answered that yes, it's ok and that yes, sometimes girls are in love with other girls and boys are in love with other boys. I asked her if she had any more questions and she didn't.

I did wonder if she was just curious or if she's starting to have some of those feelings on her own..DH thinks it's just curiosity.

[Ma_Whit]

Heh. Yes.

[Drama]

4 of my closest friends are married lesbian couples with kids. My kids have asked the usual questions and I answer them in a way that shows them that every family is different etc.

[Teresa64]

No I haven't. But ds1 is only 4 and has never asked any questions.

[Sashahomeschoolmama]

We have gay friends and dh's uncle is gay, so we present it as normal. Mommy loves Daddy, Uncle Jack loves Uncle Jim, and all of that's okay.

[pawprint]

Yes. The first time it went much like your conversation but that was years ago. Now that we are active in UU they are friends with the children of a lesbian couple and get to see multiple gay couples in a loving an accepting environment every week. I feel very blessed that they have that chance and it will always be just a part of life to them.

We also talked about it a lot when NJ was lobbying for gay marriage and only ended up with civil unions because I did a lot of work on that campaign. And also in the context of politics.

DS1 recently decided he wanted to marry his friend Amanda. And his friend Matt. At the same time. And stay home and raise their babies. ROFL. I may have gotten even mroe open mindedness than I was aiming for.

Lol Ma Whit. ;)

[JudyJudyJudy]

Yes, we have a few close gay friends (I have numerous whom I no longer see often), and Jacob knows they're gay. He also has a friend in the homeschool group who has two mothers. I think he understands the issues as well as any 9-year-old could, and he is a big defender of gay rights.

[VegasLactivist]

It's just a normal part of life in our house. We have many gay and lesbian dear close friends, and so to our kids, there is no difference. You love who you love.

[Sadalsuud]

Dd1, who is 7, asked about same sex kissing each other (I think her classmates were joking about kissing each other because her friend kissed her on the cheek). We just told her that some guys like girls and some guys like guys, some girls like guys and some girls like girls. That it doesn't matter if you are a guy or a girl, you can like whoever you want.

[joshsmom]

No, but it's really not on J's radar. He is only 3.

[still_me]

No. DS1 is 4.5 and DS2 will be 2 soon, so the topic hasn't come up.

[frannie]

My kids haven't asked any questions about homosexuality. They do know about it from TV and school I guess. I want them to from their own opinion on that topic rather than impose my view on them. We dont know any one who is gay or lesbian, so the topic doesn't come up much for us.

[Babyhellfire]

I vaguely mentioned it to dd. I can't even remember what she asked. Something about "boys can't be in love other boys?"- and I said they could- so,she then let her two little pets shop toys who were both boys have a wedding.
(she is going through an "in love" thing she groups up her pets and says they are "IN LOVE" or "getting married"- I blame Disney movies) ...but she is only three so it hasn't really come up more

than that.

[PiccoloRose]

Not yet...DD isn't quite 3 yet. I imagine we will soon, though. We have several gay friends who we see regularly.

[Tweet]

We have many gay friends, but they're all back home. Actually, DD1's old friend, Bossy MCBosserson's mom has a female partner that lives with her and her family, but they are not out to the family. So, so far no one that the kids know.

She looked REALLY embarrassed when she was asking and I don't know why. That's really what made me wonder if she had those feelings herself. I'm not sure if I should ask her or just see if she says anything else since I did let her know that yes it happens and yes it's ok. And why the hell doesn't DH get any of these questions?!

[pawprint]

Lol. It's never dad. I'd just let her go. Even though my friend Mike who is gay insists he knew he liked boys in preschool, she's still little. She'll figure it out.

[frannie]

Actually now that I think about it the kids did have a little friend that had two moms. They just came home and as part of conversation said bla bla T moms instead of saying mom and dad like it was nothing. I did ask how they knew she had two moms, they said the little girl told them they slept in the same bed. That was about it.


Tweet , does she have a best friend? Could it be that she might have said that another girl was preety (not meaning she was having feelings for her) and some else told her it wasnt okay for girls to like girls.

[konursmom]

yep, it's a normal part of our lives as well. We have several bi, gay and poly friends. We also have a transgendered friend so that gets talked about as well. She is pre-op and we never know if she will be dressed as a woman or a man so its easier to explain it ahead of time than wait for the questions. The kids get it and accept it easier than most adults.

Mali tried to tell me once that women cannot marry women, so I showed her the picture on the cover of People magazine of Ellen and Porsha's wedding. Now, she says she is going to have a wife named Lindsey and 10 daughters named Lindsey. I dont think she even knows anyone named Lindsey. lol And her husband, who is nameless, will work with Lindsey and her at the zoo while their kids work at the farm at home.

So, yea, that's covered. :hugegrin:

[SingingMom]

We've discussed it, and will probably discuss it again.

We have friends who are gay, and who also have an adopted kid. So our kids identify with the kid more than some of our other friends' kids, and the relationship is important to them.

But they seem pretty invested in the Disney romance right now, and are going through the "everything not normal is weird and slightly icky" phase. We talk more about how dating works (DD1 is 9, and DS1 is almost 8) so I have been more concerned about discussing dating than the gender of the dates. (I don't care about the gender of the dates- but I do care about dating.)

[GirlsMama]

Yes, with my oldest. With my middle girl, who is 4, we've told her some women love women and some women love men. No big deal, just part of life.

[KaraJ]

No. My dd is only 2. I'll talk to her about it whenever she's old enough to ask about it.

[CatSoup]

Not really. I have no idea what I would say.

[dalurker]

Yes, it's come up a lot.

[CatSoup]

Not really. I have no idea what I would say.

It's a bit of a touchy subject with my family and area. If anyone had any suggestions I'd be happy to hear them.

[Tweet]

Actually now that I think about it the kids did have a little friend that had two moms. They just came home and as part of conversation said bla bla T moms instead of saying mom and dad like it was nothing. I did ask how they knew she had two moms, they said the little girl told them they slept in the same bed. That was about it.


Tweet , does she have a best friend? Could it be that she might have said that another girl was preety (not meaning she was having feelings for her) and some else told her it wasnt okay for girls to like girls.

She's got lots of "best friends" lol. That is a possibility. Ironically, I could see Bossy saying something like this at recess.

It all started the other night when I put ABBA on youtube for the kids. DD1 said, "Oh mah gosh, I am so in love with those girls!" , which made me giggle because I knew she just thought their get ups were hot.That's what prompted the whole question. You may not be too far off..

Anyway, it's been interesting. She was also telling me that she wished her hair was long. When I asked why she said because you have more friends and boyfriends and boys think you're hot . :( We had a long talk about that one. I mean, seriously..they're talking about this stuff in 1st grade?!
I did ask her if she knew what "hot" meant and she said it meant "funny and nice" :p

[MrsKitty]

I haven't sat down and had "a talk", but it is a part of our lives. My best friend is queer. Three of my good friends are m2f trans. Most of my friends identify as queer, gay, lesbian, bisexual, asexual, pansexual or otherwise. I identify as queer. We go to the Pride Parade every year, and volunteer in the queer community. I don't think it is ever something I will have to talk about, its just how things are. He does have a book about different families, but its not just about homosexual couples. Children living with grandparents, two moms, single moms, single dads, childless couples who have a dog and a cat..its a big book.

[BoobySnacks]

Not yet. DD is only 5 and so far, she has not asked any questions. I am sure it will come up some day because we have a very close gay friend (male) and his sister is also a lesbian and we go to their house frequently for dinner and to hang out. She has been with her lover for 20 years. Her lover usually goes to bed earlier than us and they kiss goodnight. DD does not even bat an eye because we kiss eachother goodnight too. I kind of like it that she does not see any reason to ask any questions, they just love eachother and kiss eachother goodnight too, just like anyone who loves eachother. My male friend is not in a relationship and I wonder if she will find it more odd that two men give eachother a kiss goodnight...I guess we will see if she asks any questions then. I am not sure exactly what I will say when that time comes, but I am not uncomfortable with figuring it out.

[melissab]

Yes, we live in Mass where gay marriage is legal. My kids started asking when it was all over the news. We have also had some conversations about transgendered people, I don't think they quite understood that one.

[pawprint]

Anyway, it's been interesting. She was also telling me that she wished her hair was long. When I asked why she said because you have more friends and boyfriends and boys think you're hot . :( We had a long talk about that one. I mean, seriously..they're talking about this stuff in 1st grade?!
I did ask her if she knew what "hot" meant and she said it meant "funny and nice" :p


A little girl in ds2 preK told her family at dinner the other day that my son is hot. Her dad almost chocked on his dinner. (He's a big guy, good thing my kid is fast.) Her mom asked her what hot was and the little girl told her 'You know mom, REALLY, really cute." None of have any clue where she got it, but yeah it starts early.

DS1 thought he should get cooler clothes and hair in K so his friend A would love him. :(

I think it's strange for him , coming from a family of really laid back low matinence people. Although his mama does have hair down to her butt- and some of the reason IS it's popularity with her husband. ;) However, I would never tell THEM that!

[daniela]

With my oldest yes. Last week she was "giggling" about a gay couple that was on tv. Could be her age, she's almost 13, so we had a talk. I know that my mother has had to say something to her about it being wrong; religious reasons etc. I do not agree with my mother, and don't want my kids having the same prejudice as her.

[lisanvenice]

I didn't start having "the talk" until they were older and more in the context that I didn't care who they married as long as they somehow gave me grandchildren (that's the big joke in this house) but their have always been committed Gay and Lesbian couples (many with children their age) in their lives, at school, at church in the neighborhood, it was just sort of normal.

[MiMi_of_4]

My older grandkids know (and have a pretty good understanding of what that means as far as the loving part ~ not so much the sex part, yet) their uncles are gay. I've no doubt the younger two will follow in their footsteps and view their relationship as *normal* as one of two heterosexuals.

Recently, a lesbian couple moved into a house close to my dd. My dgd and their daughter have become close friends, somewhat in part, due to the fact that dd was one of the few people who welcomed them into the neighborhood.

Sad fact ~ there was a neighborhood get-together not too long ago, and the person who organized it invited everyone in close proximity, except for that couple :(

[Tweet]

My older grandkids know (and have a pretty good understanding of what that means as far as the loving part ~ not so much the sex part, yet) their uncles are gay. I've no doubt the younger two will follow in their footsteps and view their relationship as *normal* as one of two heterosexuals.

Recently, a lesbian couple moved into a house close to my dd. My dgd and their daughter have become close friends, somewhat in part, due to the fact that dd was one of the few people who welcomed them into the neighborhood.

Sad fact ~ there was a neighborhood get-together not too long ago, and the person who organized it invited everyone in close proximity, except for that couple :(


Things like that break my heart. I just can't imagine caring , you know? It's not a big deal..it's just people loving and liking each other.

I got to thinking about my kids, though, and what would happen if one were gay or openly bisexual or transgendered or anything out of some family members' "norm". I feel quite sad knowing that their own grandma might not want anything to do with them or at the least would look at it like a sin..right up there with drug addiction :(

Last year when Bossy was sort of bullying DD, MIL made the leap that it's because her mother has a live in female partner. Nevermind that Bossy had no clue what was going on and even if she did, bullying extends from that? Seriously??

[Bohemian]

It hasn't come up yet. Kids are 3 and 6. While they are young, I will wait for them to ask questions and answer in age appropriate terms. If it hasn't come up by a certain age, I will teach them. That is what I plan to do about most sex/love/relationship topics.

[xobehs]

In simple terms. DD's godmothers are married and have a home a beautiful child together, to them they are a family and she has asked no further. She has known about it all along, they are her godparents after all.

[Just_Peachy]

My dd1 is 7 and has asked questions so we have answered them. The other two kids (4, and 3) havent asked and it hasnt came up with them

[steelady]

DS knows he has two grandmas. He knows they share a bed and he would crawl in bed with them when he would stay over.

So he knows as much about homosexuality as he does heterosexuality.