co-sleeping w/toddler & nursing issue

[sweetkisses]

So dd falls asleep in her bed at night and then comes and gets into bed with dh and I at some point in the middle of the night. Co-sleeping really does not bother us.

What is an issue for me is her wanting to nurse when she gets in bed with us. I have been wanting her to wean for a while and have been gently encouraging it. We have been down to once a day right before bedtime. Her wanting to nurse in the middle of the night is making me want to wean her even more and is making me not like co-sleeping.

She is a little over 2 1/2. Does anyone have any suggestions on helping her understand we are not nursing in the middle of the night anymore. When I do tell her no, of course, she cries and says "Please, mommy" It makes me feel so bad I give in. I just don't know what to do!

TIA. I'll be back later to check responses.

[whitnessforhim]

I wish I had some advice. I know I'd give in too if she asked me like that! I just hope you figure things out and it gets better!!

[dimplesx3]

Hey Melissa,
Just in the past few months I have pretty much weaned ds at night. He still nurses alot during the day though. What I did was put on shirts that he could not easily get to his "Boobahs." He would fuss a good deal and then finally go to sleep. I would also have to say "No" several times. Mommy says,"No more boobah, now go to sleep." It was just wearing me out.
Now I nurse him right before bed and he goes to sleep for the night on his own. If he does wake up he doesn't even ask for boobah. Know that this took several long months.
With my dd who is now 8 it was so much easier. It only took a week of back rubs instead of nursing and she was only 13 months. Much easier child.
HTH, Terie

[Stephanie]

"Mommy's milks are closed." That was our night phrase.

There were tears, but I kept telling it to dd. I night weaned her right before ds2 was born. You many want to try having dh take her if she gets upset. That didn't work in our house, it just let to more tears, but it could work for you.

[Brianna]

I night weaned Rylan when he turned two. I told him "No nurse right now, I'll nurse you when the sun comes up." He did cry. It was really hard for about one week then he magically stopped asking. I would get up and fix him a sippy cup of water if he asked. I hope you find something that works for your family.

[PeacefulMom]

The please thing gets me too! But not at night! No way. Andrew actually woke up in the middle of the night last night and asked to nurse, he hadn't done that in a while, the answer was of course no go back to sleep. lol Which he eventually did.

We night weaned loosely following Jay Gordon's method. Andrew had been nursing a lot at night though and always slept in our bed. It may be different for you because it seems like she may be coming to your bed to nurse.

I still think the key to night nursing is daddy. My DH would hold DS while he cried and I'd leave the room - usually to pee since I was pregnant, and within moments of me stepping out of the room it was over. And when I came back it was not a big deal. I told him we could cuddle. Now sometimes when I can't nurse him for whatever reason I offer to let him hold my breast which sometimes helps.

You may also want to have a sippy cup of water at the ready for daddy to offer her in case she is thirsty. That helped us a ton too once we figured out that was part of the problem.

Congrats on the weaning progression. You have done so well with your little girl! Hope this means you're working on cooking up another one! ;)

[sweetkisses]

Congrats on the weaning progression. You have done so well with your little girl! Hope this means you're working on cooking up another one!

Thanks, Lea. And yes one will hopefully be in the works in the very near future.

[sweetkisses]

Thanks for all the responses so far.

We had a good night last night. I spoke with her about it before she went to sleep. I told her that she could have mama's milk before she went to sleep but if she woke up in the middle of the night the milk would be all gone.

DD crawled into bed with me (DH goes to work at 3am) at 3:30 and actually went right back to sleep. She didn't ask to nurse. Then she woke up around 5am asking to nurse and I told her no she needed to go back to sleep that the milk was all gone. She did cry for a few minutes. I asked her if she wanted some water and she said yes. I got her some water and that was that. She went right back to sleep. I'm going to keep that up and see how it works.

[SingingMom]

We nightweaned baby #1 by at first giving him shorter nursing sessions. I would count to ten before closing up shop. Then I would tell him, "The milk is tired. The milk lady is going to sleep."

Eventually, when he wanted to nurse at night, I could tell him that the milk was tired and that he could nurse when the sun was up.

[Stephanie]

Glad the night went well for you!