To wean or no to wean?

[limaz]

Hi there,
my son will be 10 months in mid Jan. At his 9 month appt he was 24 lbs and 31.5" long. He's a big boy and healthy. I have BF him since day one and he has never had a drop of formula. I have 5 children and he is my last. He's the only one I attempted BF with and I was missing out bigtime with my other 4. My Jonah has 5 teeth and has become extremely distracted when it's nursing time. He's a busy guy. He's been drinking water with his sippy cup since he was about 6 months old. And he has his little baby food meals. When I try to nurse him he may stay on for a total of 5 min. tops ....I'm starting to think maybe I should gently try weaning him off little by little. I'm nervous but with all my other children they were off the bottle at 10 mon. How long is my milk safe in a sippy cup? I tried giving it to him that way and he took almost an hour to drink 3 ozs. If it were a 9 oz bottle he'd drink it in 2 minutes flat. I will miss that time him and I shared and the bonding that was different from the rest of my kids. Does anyone have any thoughts or suggestions?

[Shaunsmom]

Do you want to wean or are you feeling pressure to wean from family/friends?

Our daughter is 16 months and still actively nurses anywhere from 7-9 times per day. I want her to self wean whenever she is ready. There are days that she doesn't nurse as much and there are days that she just wants to nurse.

[Jacksmommy]

I always recommend nursing until at least age 2. Of course that's for a mom who is comfortable and happy with nursing.

[limaz]

awe. I'm comfortable and happy nursing. I mean I have 5 kids , work full time and managed to do it for the first time with him, thru sore nipples, thrush, and him chewing on my nipples causing a scare one morning when one of my bottles was full of thick blood. I'm proud how he has thrived and how healthy he is. I only came on here to ask for support not to be judged. I'm not sure if I want to wean him but I know he is not interested in nursing and stays on for short minutes if at all. I wasn't sure if he was trying to tell me in his way that he does not want to nurse anymore. And what were good, safe tips for my milk. Also how I can deal with this emotionally because I look forward to our time together when we did nurse . But thanks anyway....

[shawnquella]

You should only let him use the sippy cup for an hour, bacteria could develop. It's the same as when you feed him baby food and give bottles of your expressed milk.

[Shaunsmom]

awe. I'm comfortable and happy nursing. I mean I have 5 kids , work full time and managed to do it for the first time with him, thru sore nipples, thrush, and him chewing on my nipples causing a scare one morning when one of my bottles was full of thick blood. I'm proud how he has thrived and how healthy he is. I only came on here to ask for support not to be judged. I'm not sure if I want to wean him but I know he is not interested in nursing and stays on for short minutes if at all. I wasn't sure if he was trying to tell me in his way that he does not want to nurse anymore. And what were good, safe tips for my milk. Also how I can deal with this emotionally because I look forward to our time together when we did nurse . But thanks anyway....

Who's judging anything?

[Jacksmommy]

I can't really advise on safe milk storage as I've never pumped milk. Many toddlers are very busy and lose interest in nursing for long periods. All you can do is offer. During times of teething you may find that interest in nursing increases. As to the emotions of weaning, I recommend letting things progress slowly. It will help with hormones. Also, remember how special this time is/was and be proud of the wonderful start you gave your baby.

[Bama_5]

Hi there,
my son will be 10 months in mid Jan. At his 9 month appt he was 24 lbs and 31.5" long. He's a big boy and healthy. I have BF him since day one and he has never had a drop of formula. I have 5 children and he is my last. He's the only one I attempted BF with and I was missing out bigtime with my other 4. My Jonah has 5 teeth and has become extremely distracted when it's nursing time. He's a busy guy. He's been drinking water with his sippy cup since he was about 6 months old. And he has his little baby food meals. When I try to nurse him he may stay on for a total of 5 min. tops ....I'm starting to think maybe I should gently try weaning him off little by little. I'm nervous but with all my other children they were off the bottle at 10 mon. How long is my milk safe in a sippy cup? I tried giving it to him that way and he took almost an hour to drink 3 ozs. If it were a 9 oz bottle he'd drink it in 2 minutes flat. I will miss that time him and I shared and the bonding that was different from the rest of my kids. Does anyone have any thoughts or suggestions?


Welcome.

At this age, distraction is normal. Nurse when he is interested. He may or may not pick up longer nursing sessions at some point. All of mine (5) have gone in cycles where it might look as though they were losing interest, only to resume to high level of nursing off and on until about 2 or 2 1/2 years. After 2 1/2, the level of interest does seem to drop off a bit.

Storage and Handling of Breastmilk (http://www.breastfeed-essentials.com/storagehandling.html) is a site that gives excellent advice about all types of breastmilk questions. I've directed you to the page that specifically talks about storage and handling.

You should only let him use the sippy cup for an hour, bacteria could develop. It's the same as when you feed him baby food and give bottles of your expressed milk.

I disagree with this statement and again, refer you to the website above. I'll copy and paste a few sentences from that website but you'll need to go there to get the whole picture. I'll put direct quotes from that site in blue and leave my personal comments in black to help prevent confusion (I hope).

"Human milk has been found to have properties that protect it from bacterial contamination which allow it to be stored longer than was previously thought. Guidelines for breastmilk storage are as follows" (go to site to read the "as follows" portion)


"However, most lactation experts agree that milk that is not finished at one feeding may be offered at one more feeding before needing to be discarded. Human milk has antibacterial and antimicrobial properties that result in slower spoilage as compared to other foods."

IMO, the above is especially true if you did not have to warm milk for babe to take it. I never warmed my EBM for my toddlers. I'd offer sippy then promply put back in cooler bag (if out and about) or refrigerator (if at home) and would only discard at the end of the day if not finished (or after 6-8 hours if left out depending on the room temperature). Even if you do warm it a bit, do enough just to cancel the cold chill and don't get it "hot" and you should be able to use the milk for more than on offering.

"Although the above is the latest published set of guidelines regarding safe storage times of breastmilk, keep in mind that these are just guidelines. It's wise to try to stay as close to them as possible, but milk that is older than the stated safe age, should not be automatically discarded."

Well, hope that helps answer your questions and encourages you to continue on in this wonderful relationship at whatever level your toddler welcomes.

Bama_5

[limaz]

Thanks so much Bama 5 and Jack's mommy I really appreciate your input and will take your advice. I so appreaciate your support. I'm new to this even though I have 5 kiddies. This is my first BF experience and I don't know too many moms who have breast fed, I felt like I was at that point where maybe I should stop but now I feel like I can actually keep going. I may have been mis-reading his signs. I do enjoy feeding him and feel so proud of how healthy he is and how far we have come. I love being able to give him something no one else can. I think I may get way to sensitive when it comes to nursing... weaning or not weaning that I misunderstood your origianal response :( thanks again ladies and Happy New Year.

[Bama_5]

You're welcome. I didn't have anyone to help me along (I had to find my way with books and intuition) as I didn't find this site until just before I had my 3rd ds. I'm always glad to help out anyone who needs some information or reassurance. I've learned a lot just being a part of this community, reading and sharing.

I forgot to mention that older babes are such nursing pro's, it only takes a few minutes to get what they need. Some are comfort nursers and take longer just because it feels good. Others are more businesslike and get down to business and then back to their day. Short nursing spurts does not mean small volume, often it just means strong and effective nursing.

It's easy to misread responses since we don't have body language and tone of voice to help us understand one another. Glad you stuck around and worked through it. Happy New Year to you, too.

Bama

[BlueSkies]

Bama,

I think it's wonderful that you are trying to be careful to wean at just the right time. I don't want to add to your confusion, but with my first child, I later wished that I had weaned him when his interest first waned at around 10 months. He became ill the next month, so I postponed weaning. Then, at 18 months when I tried again, he was so cognizant and verbal, that it was more difficult for both of us than it would have been earlier.


If he seems ready to be weaned painlessly, I would consider taking the opportunity. Substitute rocking and reading books to your baby to continue that closeness that you both need. You can also experiment with music. My children both love classical music and lullabies, and I would hold them and dance.

[Bama_5]

Bama,

I think it's wonderful that you are trying to be careful to wean at just the right time. I don't want to add to your confusion, but with my first child, I later wished that I had weaned him when his interest first waned at around 10 months. He became ill the next month, so I postponed weaning. Then, at 18 months when I tried again, he was so cognizant and verbal, that it was more difficult for both of us than it would have been earlier.


If he seems ready to be weaned painlessly, I would consider taking the opportunity. Substitute rocking and reading books to your baby to continue that closeness that you both need. You can also experiment with music. My children both love classical music and lullabies, and I would hold them and dance.


Blue Skies, Are you sure you meant to address this to me (Bama)? I have said nothing about being interested in weaning or confusion. I am happily nursing my 26 month old with no immediate plans to wean. I think you might have intended to address the OP.

I understand wanting to take advantage of a weaning window and am sorry to hear you struggled with weaning your toddler. However, I could not recommend someone wean their 10 month old and offered the advice I did to the OP because she said she wants to continue this relationship.

Bama

[BlueSkies]

Bama, you are right. This post was not meant for you, but for limaz. I do understand that there can be some advantages to continuing to nurse. For me, it was not possible to wait. My biological alarm clock was already on snooze, and I did not ovulate while I nursed, so I had to wean him to have another child.

[Bama_5]

BlueSkies,

Weaning at 18 months (as it appears you did with your ds) is much different, imo, than at 9 1/2 months (the age of the baby in the OP). Even with that personal opinion, I gave my advice based on the OP's desire to continue more than on my personal choice.

It sounds like your plan (weaning to work towards a new babe) worked for you and certainly you are not the only one to have faced that crossroad. I'm glad you were blessed with the second bundle of joy and hope my comments did not sound like I was judging your situation. I trust your explanation was more in the line of conversation than defense.

Your love and bonding shows in your post where name wonderful ways of bonding outside of nursing. Sounds like examples I've given from time to time when the topic was on how to wean.

Bama

[BlueSkies]

I don't hear anything judgmental about you at all, just caring.

I truly loved nursing. It was one of the most joyful experiences of my life.