Help me decide what to push for

[Michele]

I found out yesterday that one of my students won the Do the Write thing writing challenge again this year. This comes with a D.C. trip for the kid, one parent, and their teacher to participate in the National Campaign to Stop Violence week activities. This is the third year in a row one of my students has won the trip out of over 1,000 entries each year. (Shameless brag--I am the mutha-flippin' when it comes to teaching writing.)

I was unable to go the first year because Safia was little and I was still nursing several times a day. Plus, I wasn't ready to be away from her yet. Last year, Dh and I paid for flights for all of us and made a family vacation out of it. Even with the hotel covered by the program, we spent a goodly sum on air, meals, museums, etc. It was totally worth it and an amazing experience.

This year, I am scheduled to teach summer school. I could get a sub for the 4 days I'd miss, but I would lose money as a result. Also, I would not take all the kids--too expensive and the taxman spanked us this year. I would either go alone, or maybe see if Grandma or my brother could take the girls for the week (tantamount to getting the planets to align) and DH could get catch the flight and we could have a vacation alone--which we haven't had since Sianna was 4, seven years ago. I have 4 activities that I attend: an embassy dinner (which Dh could attend), a brunch and planning meeting (4 hours--no DH), Capitol tour (2-3 hours--no DH), and an awards dinner/ceremony (3-4 hours--no DH). DH and I would have a lot of time to sight-see and explore sans kids.

If I opt not to go, I can send another teacher or our principal in my place.

Help me pro/con this. I need to make a decision relatively soon.

[JudyJudyJudy]

I'd go. I'd either go alone or try to get Grandma or brother to keep the kids so that dh can go.

How old is your stepdaughter? Is she mature enough to keep the kids if the others won't?

[Michele]

SDS is 17 and in no way equipped to deal with my two for any extended period of time. My 11yo thinks she knows all and she and the 17 yo argue constantly. I suspect Sianna would smother the 17 yo in her sleep if I left the 17 yo in charge for any real span of time. The 4 yo is sweet, but highly manipulative. She would end up subsisting on chocolate chips and mac-n-cheese whilst she gave herself foot problems from wearing princess heels 24/7 while I was gone. No, alas, DSD is not an option. Grandma *might* do it. I will have to talk to DH.

[JudyJudyJudy]

I can totally understand about your dsd not being able to deal with it. I was babysitting overnight at that age, but I wouldn't feel comfortable leaving Jacob in the care of my 20yo dsd who has two kids herself. She's just too immature.

I hope you're able to figure something out.

[MrsKitty]

I hope you figure something out, that sounds like a fantastic opportunity:) Hopefully grandma will do it.

[Michele]

I like that you are totally honest about your kiddos. It is refreshing. I hope you find great reliable childcare and you are able to go on the trip.

CM, I thank 15 years as a middle school teacher for that one. I love my kids dearly for who they are, but in no way do I expect to them to be perfect nor do I consider their personality "failings" a reflection on myself. Too many parents get all wrapped up in this dream image they have of their kids being perfect and they take it personally when and if the kid isn't. We get a lot of crazy "My child would never!" parents. Well, I have been around enough kids to know that my child would, even if I would like to think otherwise. Don't get my wrong, I am my kids' biggest cheerleader, but I am also well aware of who they are as people and I make a conscious effort to be realistic and mindful of my expectations for them. In no way are the expectations "lowered" mind you; they are just kept in check.

[Michele]

I hope you figure something out, that sounds like a fantastic opportunity:) Hopefully grandma will do it.

MK, it is an awesome experience. DH said he will speak to his mother. If she won't do it, my grandparents *might* be willing to come down and stay with them, particularly if DSD is there to help out. I hope it all works out. I hate to fly, but Dh and I could really use some time sans kids. Our marriage is fine, but a few days alone would help us reconnect. DH really does take a backseat to the girls. I would like to have a few days for him to feel like my attention isn't divided.

[Maret00]

I would go! Spend the time with the hubby! D.C is great!

[JudyJudyJudy]

We get a lot of crazy "My child would never!" parents.
Those parents are EVERYWHERE! My favorites are the ones who swear to this for the first 15 minutes of a conference and then spend the rest of the time complaining about how they can't make their kids behave and how they do the same things at home.

[SingingMom]

I have never been a middle school teacher, but I have taught horse riding camp. And these parents are the ones who will come and scream at you for taking their kids off the horses, and denying them valuable riding time.

"But sir, your child decided to turn around and sit in the saddle backwards with her eyes closed. And then proceeded to drop the reins and stand on the saddle."

"Well, why weren't you watching her?"

"I WAS watching her. That's why I took her off the horse, who is too old to participate in circus acrobatics with your child."

[MrsKitty]

Oh god singingmom.. ugh..

I have had similar experiences working in retail. Kids running around knocking things over or breaking things, or running out the front door, and the parents flip at us for not watching them. Uhh...

I can't even imagine having to deal with those same parents on a daily basis.