Tweet
05-24-2009, 06:49 PM
This year I really wanted to have a super fun birthday. I haven't really celebrated my own birthday for 7, almost 8 years now. Well, this year I really wanted to go out for dinner and dancing.
To back up a bit, 3 of us moms took our kids to the beach for 2 nights (Wed thru Friday, my bday was on Friday). The moms had begged me to go...it would make it easier for them financially to split the cost of the beach house and we could hang out and catch up. Ok, that sounded ok,but I was dreading having to deal with my friend's older son...he's got some undiagnosed issues and has to be watched with the younger kids. But, with three of us, I figured it could work.
Well, it definitely had it's fun moments. But, it was also hard because one of my friends's husband decided he wanted a separation recently. So it was pretty emotional . The other friend can also identify because her husband had left her a couple of years ago. So, it was a lot of listening and supporting. I was happy to do so, but it was a bit draining.
Fast forward to Friday, my bday. I wanted to get going so I could celebrate w/ DH and then SAt night was the night of dinner and dancing. I got lost trying to get back home and it took me almost 4 hours instead of 2.5!
Well. DH had done NOTHING for my bday. No cake,no present, nothing. There was a card, but it was obvious he just hurried and picked one up. He didn't even have the kids (prior to us leaving) make a card or anything. I was so,so hurt. And pissed. Maybe it's petty, but damn..every year I get him a cake, his mom and aunt come out for a visit, and we have a party. EVERY year. And he can't celebrate mine with me?? I told him off ,cried,and then went to bed. I was so pissed and hurt. Still am, actually.
So, then there was last night. Lots couldn't make it because of it being Memorial weekend. Some canceled. One of my best friends , the one whose asshole H wants to separate, SWORE up and down she was coming out to celebrate my day. She took a nap and everything, she said. She was coming, she said. I got a call from her as soon as I arrived at the restaurant that nope, she wasn't coming. Why, you ask? Because " well, he might want to talk and I'd hate to miss the communication". Wtf? Why couldn't he talk BEFORE?? I know it's her marriage and all. She's just not really been there for me for a long, long time and it's certainly nothing new to bail on me. But I was hoping she'd come out for a bit. After all, I'd just listened to her and wiped her tears and vented with her for 2 whole days..I figure she could return the support for a half hour.
So, it ended up being a couple of us at dinner and one lady that I don't know very well that offered to take me dancing. We did and it was pretty fun. I drank probably too much, but had fun doing so. I hadn't been dancing in 8 years. Who knew that the girl I barely know was the very nicest one?
And now I feel like a bitch for being pissed off at my friend. I get that it's her marriage ending. It's been going on the whole time I've known her The guy is a prick and an asshole of the highest order. And you know what? She's just a shitty friend. It's time to just cut her out.Not because of the birthday thing, but the other shit she's pulled. Always expecting support, and not giving it. She is the one that didn't invite my kids last year to her kid's bday party. No big woop. However, she called the night before the party to say that no one had rsvpd and could my kids come? Oh, but that if any of them showed up, I'd have to pay for my kids' food. This is just how she is . So, I'm done,done,done.
To back up a bit, 3 of us moms took our kids to the beach for 2 nights (Wed thru Friday, my bday was on Friday). The moms had begged me to go...it would make it easier for them financially to split the cost of the beach house and we could hang out and catch up. Ok, that sounded ok,but I was dreading having to deal with my friend's older son...he's got some undiagnosed issues and has to be watched with the younger kids. But, with three of us, I figured it could work.
Well, it definitely had it's fun moments. But, it was also hard because one of my friends's husband decided he wanted a separation recently. So it was pretty emotional . The other friend can also identify because her husband had left her a couple of years ago. So, it was a lot of listening and supporting. I was happy to do so, but it was a bit draining.
Fast forward to Friday, my bday. I wanted to get going so I could celebrate w/ DH and then SAt night was the night of dinner and dancing. I got lost trying to get back home and it took me almost 4 hours instead of 2.5!
Well. DH had done NOTHING for my bday. No cake,no present, nothing. There was a card, but it was obvious he just hurried and picked one up. He didn't even have the kids (prior to us leaving) make a card or anything. I was so,so hurt. And pissed. Maybe it's petty, but damn..every year I get him a cake, his mom and aunt come out for a visit, and we have a party. EVERY year. And he can't celebrate mine with me?? I told him off ,cried,and then went to bed. I was so pissed and hurt. Still am, actually.
So, then there was last night. Lots couldn't make it because of it being Memorial weekend. Some canceled. One of my best friends , the one whose asshole H wants to separate, SWORE up and down she was coming out to celebrate my day. She took a nap and everything, she said. She was coming, she said. I got a call from her as soon as I arrived at the restaurant that nope, she wasn't coming. Why, you ask? Because " well, he might want to talk and I'd hate to miss the communication". Wtf? Why couldn't he talk BEFORE?? I know it's her marriage and all. She's just not really been there for me for a long, long time and it's certainly nothing new to bail on me. But I was hoping she'd come out for a bit. After all, I'd just listened to her and wiped her tears and vented with her for 2 whole days..I figure she could return the support for a half hour.
So, it ended up being a couple of us at dinner and one lady that I don't know very well that offered to take me dancing. We did and it was pretty fun. I drank probably too much, but had fun doing so. I hadn't been dancing in 8 years. Who knew that the girl I barely know was the very nicest one?
And now I feel like a bitch for being pissed off at my friend. I get that it's her marriage ending. It's been going on the whole time I've known her The guy is a prick and an asshole of the highest order. And you know what? She's just a shitty friend. It's time to just cut her out.Not because of the birthday thing, but the other shit she's pulled. Always expecting support, and not giving it. She is the one that didn't invite my kids last year to her kid's bday party. No big woop. However, she called the night before the party to say that no one had rsvpd and could my kids come? Oh, but that if any of them showed up, I'd have to pay for my kids' food. This is just how she is . So, I'm done,done,done.