New here Please help! I am going out of my mind.

[gymbogordon]

Hello I am so glad I found a group of moms who feels the same way I do about breastfeeding. But I must admit that I am having a hard time right now. My daughter is 16.5 months old. She is still waking up at night screaming at the top of her lungs she used to not do that she would just wake up (her crib is next to our bed) and wimper. Now she screams, it all started when she was teething really bad a few weeks ago. I allowed her to be pacified on my breast because of her teething pain. Now she is not teething right now & it still contines!
She then gets aggravated because she is trying to sleep but can't because her dad is in the way or she wants to roll all over ( like in her crib) So she starts screaming again.
THen during the day she is tugging at my shirt way too much. I feel as if she is a newborn but she is not she is a toddler!
I don't want to wean her I don't want to put her into her own room & let her cry. But what other choice do I have? I just want to cry sometimes my husband is a ironworker so he has a very dangerous job. He needs his sleep. We are christian parents who want the best for our daughter we just don't know how to get there. (oh by the way my husband refuses to sleep away from me) He is a great husband & dad.

Sorry for ranting but I need all the suggestions or advice I can get :hugegrin:

[Shaunsmom]

Does the breastfeeding at night time help soothe her? If so, I would continue to nurse on demand, if you can tolerate it. It sounds like a frustrating situation and if you can find something to help, that would be great:)

Our DD is 22 months and we co-sleep. There are some restless nights for her as well but bfing her is generally the "cure all, fix all" thru the night for our DD.

The amount that a toddler may want to bf can vary. There are days that our DD also is like a newborn, wanting to suckle every little while. That can be draining on the mama because it feels like you are bfing all the time. However, I wouldn't be too quick to wean either:)

Letting her CIO isn't anything I'd recommend. That is one thing I am against...with that said, what help are you looking for?

Wanting to wean advice?

Letting her CIO?

Soothing techniques for when she awakens thru the night?

Hope things get better for you;)

[gymbogordon]

Oh man I don't want to let her cio. I don't mind the nursing for comfort either. I love that she does that actually. She is just so restless she tosses & turns which keeps me awake if we co sleep. We co slept for a little while but she likes to have her own area for sleeping. I was thinking of putting my mattress on the floor along with hers so I did that & she just rolled all over the place climbing over me to be near my husband who gets up at 4 in the morning to commute to chicago to build skyscrapers. (so he needs his sleep)
I co slept with my son & he just laid next to me and nursed it was easy. She is just so restless.

[tifttu]

I was going to suggest sidecaring the crib so she could have her space and still be next to you, but if she's crawling over you and waking your DH, well, that wouldn't really help. I know as far as nursing goes, mine went through a few phases of it being worse when they were a toddler than when they were a baby. It does get better. I don't think any of my night suggestions will help much. With DS, we ended up getting a king size bed to give everyone enough space to sleep. With DD, she decided she was done sleeping with us before she night weaned so I spend most of the night in her room. I start in my bed with DH and we have our quiet time together, but after her first waking, I just sleep the rest of the night with her (she usually wakes at 11, 3, and then nurses and dozes for a bit before she's up at 7). Those wakings usually involve crying or screaming. I keep telling myself once she has all of her teeth (3 2yr molars to go), it will get better. That's when DS really started doing better.

[whitnessforhim]

I agree with maybe sidecaring the crib. We do that, not because she sleeps there really, but because it gives me the much needed extra space.

I am nursing my 19mo. old and she does the same exact thing when she is teething and she sleeps right next to me every night. She walks up crying looking frantically for me and won't stop until I nurse her back to sleep. Yes, it does seem as though she nurses like a newborn. She goes through this every time I know she is teething. Some days I wake up with sore shoulders and arms from being in one position for too long, nursing her all night. But the one piece of hope I can offer is this really is just a phase and it will pass. Teething pain can be off and on for weeks at a time until the teeth finally pop through. I agree that once they get all of their teeth it does get better. Hang in there momma. This sounds like normal teething issues to me.

You could try a bit of motrin or tylenol to relieve the pain. Neither of the really work well for her and I found out motrin actually gives her a rash. So we've opted not to use anything. I just try to bare through it knowing that with time it will get better and it has.

[crystal555rose]

I can't sleep with my son either- he rolls around, grabs my face (in his sleep), kicks my husband, etc. He has his own twin size mat on the floor (since he rolls all over) in his room. He makes a peep and I am there. With the distance my husband is rarely woken up.

My son wakes up crying when he has an ear infection. His last one he never got a fever, he just started waking up to nurse in the middle of the night. It is worth checking out if you feel this behavior is out of the ordinary.

[StillSingingMom]

I'd check to see if maybe she's still teething. It's possible that the teething is disturbing her sleep, again, more, still.

It sounds like she is disturbed by something else and not able to settle down into restful sleep. It's time to look for signs of allergies, ear infections, sore throat, teething. Also, she could be too cold or too hot.

Also, your husband wants to sleep with you. But there are safety issues for him being short on sleep, so maybe once in a while you can take the baby elsewhere and try to sleep with her somewhere else and settle her down. Not as a long term strategy, just as a let's-get-through-this-night-solution.

[Jacksmommy]

At 16 months my son was teething and experiencing separation anxiety. I gave him Hyland's teething tablets and co-slept with him every night and for every nap. There was just no way for him to feel secure otherwise. By 2 he was comfortable sleeping in his own bed after I nursed him to sleep.

[kwazyca]

I've been nursing for 3 and a half years, and I had the same problem. My son would get so frustrated when he couldn't roll around while in our bed. When he'd start to cry I'd just offer my breast and that would quiet him down right away. All I can recommend is to stick it out, and I bet she'll get through this. They all go through tough times just like us adults :o)

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[Maret00]

A women in my La Leche league told me this and I love it! She has 2 queen beds put together so they can roll all night and still have room. We couldnt afford or have room for the 2 queen idea but we do have a queen and now a twin that my hubby uses for the most part. They are right next to each other and it works out great we are together but have a little more room. And when our son is old enough he can have the twin unless we have another one and still need the room.

Also have you used motrin to help with the pain? She may still have some other teeth coming in that you dont know about it takes my son like 2 mo for teeth to come in.

About nursing all day, I think, she has just learned that nursing is a way to have mommy to herself. She may also be trying to increasse your supply, or haveing a little seperation angziaty (sp)