Latching/nipple issues-will she ever latch?

[MrsGrubb]

I am a mother to 3 children, my most recent being 3 1/2 weeks old.

I tried breastfeeding all three: #1 I pumped for 6 weeks because he wouldn't latch, #2 I pumped for a week and he refused the breast, and I had no idea what I was doing...

And now, with our daughter I had a rocky start-she was given formula in the NICU(was there for 24 hours), and have not been able to get her to latch since. My nipples are very soft, and when hard they are extremely short. After trying numerous techniques recommended on various websites, I'm now trying a nipple shield, although she still seems to not be getting much at all, even though I have an abundant supply(I pump after every feeding, and feed her the bottle if she's still hungry).

So I guess my question is, will she eventually latch? I read that "a baby will latch by 4 to 8 weeks no matter what." Really? Because it seems that my baby is never going to get this down-I think part of the problem is that I can never get her to open her mouth wide enough!!

Anyone have suggestions/encouragement? Thanks.

[StillSingingMom]

If you have an abundant supply, why are you worried that she's not getting much at all? What are the signs that your baby isn't getting milk? With some more info, we can probably come up with some suggestions.

If sometimes she is NOT hungry after nursing, I'd put the bottles away for now. A nipple shield can come with a whole set of problems, so I'd not recommend using one without the guidance of a good LC. I don't think it's true that a baby will latch after four to eight weeks no matter what, especially with a nipple shield and bottles involved.

So, first: count the wet diapers. If you see six to eight wet diapers a day, your baby is getting enough.

Short nipples are not a common problem. More people have trouble with excessively large aereolas. Soft nipples are also not a problem, except maybe for you- but baby can handle that with no problem at all.

More likely, you are having trouble with bottle preference. Nursing requires more effort from the baby than feeding from a bottle; it's a totally different technique, and the bottle nipple is much easier to feed from. (This is part of why nursing is good for your baby- it develops her mouth structure like you wouldn't believe.)

I'd say you need some real life help, and fast. A lactation consultant would be really helpful, and failing that, try to find a local La Leche League meeting. Bring your baby and you'll find a group of women who've seen a lot of problems and will probably be able to offer suggestions.

[crystal555rose]

I had to use my fingers to create something for him to latch on to and it took weeks and many mislatches to get it right. Afterall, no one has a nipple that looks like a bottle nipple. Now at 20 months it amazes me how proficient he is at latching- any position, even semi-conscious.

I agree with StillSingingMom. Get a good LC. Nurse, nurse, nurse. I wish you the best of luck!

[StillSingingMom]

On re-reading your post, I realize that you are not ever getting a latch. That's a big problem.

So here's some more advice (and encouragement- Go Momma!):

Try latching her on BEFORE she is very hungry. Offer a little less in the bottle at her feeding, and try to catch her before she would normally be demanding her next feeding. Pump a little (or manually express) so that you have a letdown BEFORE trying to latch her on. Pick a time for this when you are not tired and hungry yourself, so you can be as relaxed as possible.

Since you have NEVER had successful latch, you need to help your baby understand that nursing is a way to get milk. It's not too late. You'll want to cheat a bit, by getting the flow going before latching her on. (Babies normally figure out how to get a let down because they nurse so often in the first days after birth. It takes some vigorous suckling at first, which your little one is not going to want to do, since there's no milk yet.)

Also, what are using to feed her? Try to pick a bottle/nipple combo that mimics breastfeeding as closely as possible, or consider ditching the bottles altogether and try a Supplemental Nursing System. If you haven't seen these before, it's a little bag of milk you hang around your neck with a tube you tape to your breast. This provides milk (or formula, whatever) to the baby, no matter how her latch is. So she can at least start to associate the breast with food.

The SNS is one of my favorite alternatives, becuase baby learns to eat from the breast, and also stimulates more milk production, which is really helpful.

You can also try some other things, like wearing baby in a sling. It's possible that just hanging out next to the breasts will get her attention.

You are working really hard already, with all that pumping (Yayyy!) With a little more help, if we can get a latch going, we can save you a lot of effort. It's so much easier to just nurse.

Remember that baby's tummy is really small. It's easy to overfeed a baby with a bottle, which then keeps her from being hungry for a long time. That doesn't help her latch or your supply. Make sure you have slow flow nipples for the bottles, if you keep on using them, and that you are giving two to three ounces at a time. (Feel free to ignore this if, as is probably the case, you already know all this. I'm just making sure.)

You are already really good at pumping, obviously. And you are obviously a very experienced mother. I really hope we can help you find a way to get a latch!

[Nipple_nectar]

I agree that since you have introduced a bottle, you are probably experiencing nipple confusion: www.breastfeeding.com/all_about/all_about_confusion.html

I would stop all artificial nipples at once, no bottles or pacifiers until you are on track. That means no nipple shield either, use it as a last resort. If you must supplement, use a BFing friendly feeding alternative: www.kellymom.com/bf/pumping/alternative-feeding.html

Using a pump for five minutes, prior to trying to get baby to latch will help prime the nipple, making it pointy and easier to grab onto.

Using a positioning tool like a boppy will help tremendously, if you are large breasted, you can roll a washcloth and place it under the breast you are nursing from, it will help align baby with the nipple. Watching the tutorials here will also help: www.drjacknewman.com