CaptHeather
10-19-2007, 01:21 PM
Mele311
Member
Reged: 04/25/06
Posts: 278
Loc: Albuquerque NM Facing me (long post)
#198410 - 07/20/06 04:35 PM Edit Reply Quote Quick Reply
I have been lurking at this board since I became a member. Maybe just for something that I need to do. Maybe just to scared to say anything until now after reading all of your stories I think that it's time to face my truth. It all started in 2002 I met this guy who worked at the community college that I went to he was a security guard. Well I would wait for my sister after my last class ended which was about two hours I would go to the library and get a book to read or do some homework. One day the SG came up to me and started to talk to me and said that he had been watching me for a long time. We talked and got to know each other a little better and started an unofficial relationship, but it was a sexual one.
This went on for about a year. Well he decided that he wanted to now date my sister and I was heartbroken even though we didn't have an official relationship. I was upset at both my sister and him even though me and my sister lived together I never spoke to her before all this happened we were very close could talk about anything. It was a very trying time for both of us and my mom wondered what was going on. The SG would come to our house to pick my sister up for dates and I couldn't stand that. Before I knew it I found myself three months pregnant.
I knew that it his because he was the last person that I was with I didn't continue to have any kind of relationship with him after he started dating and having sex with my sister (gross I know) my mom and brother went on a trip and me and my sister went out to eat to try to make amends and I told her I haven't gotten my period in three months and she said are you serious? So after dinner we went to get a test and it turned out positive. I cried that whole night and I couldn't believe that this was happening. He came over the next day and said well, we both know that you can't have this baby.
There is something that I need to tell you right now and I said what he said that he's married. And that he'd been married for almost five years I couldn't believe what I was hearing. He said that if I had this baby he would make my life a living hell. He was a computer geek and said that he could hack into lots of systems and get a warrant out for my arrest, change my bank statements, and make it so that I was never born or existed, most of all he said that he would take me to court to get custody if I had this child. I knew the kind of person he was I didn't want that to happen. I didn't know what to do I was at my wits ended I was getting harassed, he said that he made an appt for me at a clinic and in fear for my life and this unborn child’s life. So I went. It was the worst mistake of my life. How could I live with my self I thought. I kept it a secret from everyone that I knew. I had this pain inside of me that I just couldn't explain to anyone. I would cry every night on my pillow.
One night me and my mom got into an argument and she said what's wrong with you why are you acting this way and then I knew I had to tell her. I told her that I terminated a pregnancy and she started to cry I have never seen my mother cry and she said how could you do this I know that was just the hurt talking. Later she told me she understands why I did what I did and she doesn't have the right to be angry at me. I felt relived about telling her.
Every Year after that I had a memorial on the day it happened and on what would have been her birthday October 7, 2002 . I just knew that it was a girl.
It was until recently that I went to confession after 12 years of not going and my priest made me feel so relieved that I could finally be forgiven for what I have done.
My penance was to plant a tree in memory of her and to give her a name. He told me I truly know that you knew the sex of this child.
So I did I named her Abigail. I have yet to plant a tree I haven't found the perfect one yet.
Thank you all for listening.
Member
Reged: 04/25/06
Posts: 278
Loc: Albuquerque NM Facing me (long post)
#198410 - 07/20/06 04:35 PM Edit Reply Quote Quick Reply
I have been lurking at this board since I became a member. Maybe just for something that I need to do. Maybe just to scared to say anything until now after reading all of your stories I think that it's time to face my truth. It all started in 2002 I met this guy who worked at the community college that I went to he was a security guard. Well I would wait for my sister after my last class ended which was about two hours I would go to the library and get a book to read or do some homework. One day the SG came up to me and started to talk to me and said that he had been watching me for a long time. We talked and got to know each other a little better and started an unofficial relationship, but it was a sexual one.
This went on for about a year. Well he decided that he wanted to now date my sister and I was heartbroken even though we didn't have an official relationship. I was upset at both my sister and him even though me and my sister lived together I never spoke to her before all this happened we were very close could talk about anything. It was a very trying time for both of us and my mom wondered what was going on. The SG would come to our house to pick my sister up for dates and I couldn't stand that. Before I knew it I found myself three months pregnant.
I knew that it his because he was the last person that I was with I didn't continue to have any kind of relationship with him after he started dating and having sex with my sister (gross I know) my mom and brother went on a trip and me and my sister went out to eat to try to make amends and I told her I haven't gotten my period in three months and she said are you serious? So after dinner we went to get a test and it turned out positive. I cried that whole night and I couldn't believe that this was happening. He came over the next day and said well, we both know that you can't have this baby.
There is something that I need to tell you right now and I said what he said that he's married. And that he'd been married for almost five years I couldn't believe what I was hearing. He said that if I had this baby he would make my life a living hell. He was a computer geek and said that he could hack into lots of systems and get a warrant out for my arrest, change my bank statements, and make it so that I was never born or existed, most of all he said that he would take me to court to get custody if I had this child. I knew the kind of person he was I didn't want that to happen. I didn't know what to do I was at my wits ended I was getting harassed, he said that he made an appt for me at a clinic and in fear for my life and this unborn child’s life. So I went. It was the worst mistake of my life. How could I live with my self I thought. I kept it a secret from everyone that I knew. I had this pain inside of me that I just couldn't explain to anyone. I would cry every night on my pillow.
One night me and my mom got into an argument and she said what's wrong with you why are you acting this way and then I knew I had to tell her. I told her that I terminated a pregnancy and she started to cry I have never seen my mother cry and she said how could you do this I know that was just the hurt talking. Later she told me she understands why I did what I did and she doesn't have the right to be angry at me. I felt relived about telling her.
Every Year after that I had a memorial on the day it happened and on what would have been her birthday October 7, 2002 . I just knew that it was a girl.
It was until recently that I went to confession after 12 years of not going and my priest made me feel so relieved that I could finally be forgiven for what I have done.
My penance was to plant a tree in memory of her and to give her a name. He told me I truly know that you knew the sex of this child.
So I did I named her Abigail. I have yet to plant a tree I haven't found the perfect one yet.
Thank you all for listening.