Funny Things Moms and Dads Would Never Say

Things Moms Would Never Say:

How on earth can you see that TV sitting so far back?
Yeah, I used to skip school a lot, too.
Just leave all the lights on, it makes the house look more cheery.
Don't bother wearing a jacket, the wind-chill is bound to improve.
Let me smell that shirt. Yeah, it's good for another week.
Well, if Johnny's mom says it's OK, that's good enough for me.
I don't have a tissue - just use your sleeve.
Go ahead and keep that stray dog, honey. I'll be happy to feed
and walk him every day.
The curfew is just a general time to shoot for. It's not like I'm
running a prison around here.

Things Dads Would Never Say:

Well, how about that? I'm lost! Looks like we'll have to stop and
ask for directions!
I noticed that all your friends have a certain "up yours" attitude -
I like that.
You know pumpkin, now that you're 13, you'll be ready for
unchaperoned car dates. Won't that be fun?
Here's the credit card and the keys to my new car - go crazy!
Your mother and I are going away for the weekend. You may
want to throw a party.
No son of mine is going to live under this roof without an earring.
Now quit your belly-aching and let's go the mall.
What do you want to get a job for? I make plenty of money for
you to spend.
Father's Day? Aahh...don't worry about it...it's no big deal.

Cartoon Copyright Joan McCartney