Vignettes of Nursing Humor II

A collection of funny stories from our members 

You said that you wanted a story, well, do I have one for you! I had just delivered my fourth child, and I had decided to breastfeed him. I didn't think a thing about my other three thinking anything about it. I knew that I hadn't got to breastfeed the other ones, and that this was my last chance.

Well, my daughter, age four, thought that it was the weirdest thing she had ever heard of...putting a baby on your boob! Gross! I don't know where she got it, because in our home, we are pretty comfortable with our bodies and had never told her that before. So, we, or I rather, told her that it will make my tummy go back down, and it will make the baby happy at the same time.

Thinking that she was satisfied with this, it was dropped...or so I thought!

I walked in her bedroom with her trying on one of her favorite outfits, and she had grown, and it didn't fit as well as it was supposed to, so I told her that I would get her another outfit, she said, "That's okay momma, I'll just feed baby brother for you, that way, I can wear my shirt, and he will get full!"

I thought I was going to fall over, she had remembered that my tummy went down after I breastfed him.....the things that kids will say!

When my second daughter was about 1 and 1/2 years and still nursing, she and her older sister then 3 years, were playing (fighting over a toy bike).

My oldest daughter turns to her younger sister and very nicely puts her arm around her sister and calls her name and says, "Don't you want to nurse, go get some gooood milk from Momma".

Well I thought my mother-in-law and grandmother-in-law would never stop laughing and what was even more humorous was that the second daughter left the toy and came to me and proceeded to nurse. I guess older sisters really do know what there younger sisters want.

P.S. I did have a talk with daughter #1, about not always being able to have your way.

Jan Roy
Morgan City, Louisiana




 
I thought I had explained everything about breastfeeding to my son, Ryan, but I guess I left a part out!

I was checking out a daycare with my son, Ryan who is 8. I was going back to work, my baby was 3 months old and we needed to find a suitable daycare.

We were at this very nice daycare center, after we had looked all around, my son was looking at all the young girl workers. He looked at me and said, "So, which one is going to breastfeed Sidney"?

Tricia Ingraham
Pembroke, New Hampshire
USA





Roman and I visited my godparents when he was still quite new. I was still getting the hang of breastfeeding in front of others, and discretely draped a blanket over us while I fed him in their living room.

Mindy, their 13-year-old daughter, was unaware of what was going on. She asked, "May I see the baby?" "He's eating ," I replied." "Oh... may I see?"

I hesitated for a moment, and she urged, "I promise I won't laugh at your boobs!"

I got a good chuckle, and Mindy got to watch Roman eat.

Ulrike Grimaldi





The other day I was over at my parents' house and breastfeeding my 2- month-old daughter. My dad sat down beside me and ask me out of nowhere, "Do you know what those little bumps around your nipple are for?" I said, "No." 

He said, "That is Braille for suck here!" After he said it his whole face turned red. I just died laughing not only at the joke, but how red his face got telling me it.

Niki Tilley