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                                                                          BreastfeedingThe Lighter Side Vignettes of Nursing Humor III
 
 
 
 
 
 

Vignettes of Nursing Humor III

A collection of funny stories from our members



While staying at my parents' home after giving birth to twin boys, I opted to breastfeed in the family room. My aunt and her daughters along with one of their your sons came for a visit that day. Everyone was in the dining room and my cousin's son was outside playing. So, I sat back and started feeding my children.

Pretty soon the young boy came into the house. He could see that I was holding the boys but did not know what I was doing. That spiked his interest. He sat himself down on one of the sofas on the far side of the room. A couple of minutes passed and he got up and moved closer to where I was sitting. After a few more minutes, he got up once again and I found him sitting right next to me. I could see the wonder in his eyes and knew that he wanted to know what I was doing. I told him that I was giving the babies their milk.

He looked at me with all the innocence of a child and said, "My Mommy gets mine out the refrigerator!" What can you say to that?

Teresa Musacchia





Quite a few years ago I had spent a lot of time with a brand new mother. I had left the infant with her for the night and had told her to leave me a note in the infant's crib to let me know how long the baby had nursed and how many wet and dirty diapers the infant had had.

When I went to pick up the infant for morning lab work the mom was still asleep, but in the infant's bed was a note that said that the baby had had one wet diaper, two messy diapers and approximately 784 sucks.

I could just picture that poor mom thinking she had to count how many sucks every feeding! When I returned the infant to her I told her that breastfeeding was supposed to be an enjoyable experience and that she only needed to give me an estimate of how many minutes the baby had nursed. The relief on her face was priceless, and I wondered how I had royally messed up that teaching session!

I kept that little note written on a paper towel for years. All of us on duty that night got a big chuckle and were really impressed with her dedication. We wondered how many she might have missed!

Gail Vold
Woodstock, Georgia





I am pregnant with my third child. My 2 year old is still nursing, but my breasts become very tender during my first trimester and nursing is painful. So, I decided to tell my two year old that my Nannu's (our code word for nursing) have owies. This way she would not feel responsible for the pain I was feeling.

One night she wanted to nurse and I told her that my nannu's have owies and she kissed my breasts to make them feel better and went right back to nursing. So much for the owies.

We have two beautiful daughters, Kelsey, 3 1/2 years old, and Samantha Jo, 12 weeks. Kelsey had been very interested in my nursing Sami Jo since the first time she had seen me. She insisted on nursing her many times but I tried to explain to her that she could not do it. She did not understand why and wanted an explanation, so I told her she did not have milk in her boobies so Sami's tummy would not get full.

She then said "I have chocolate milk in my boobies, and Sami doesn't like chocolate milk.." Well, I was not even thinking and I replied "Yes, okay honey, now go play." A few days had past and I never even thought about it again until one day we went to Walmart. There was an older man greeting us as we came into the store and he came up to us and was admiring both girls. He told Kelsey how lucky she was to have a little sister and asked her if she liked her. Kelsey replied, "Yes, and Sami likes mommies boobies because she has milk in them, but she doesn't like mine because I have chocolate milk in mine."

Then she lifted up her shirt and said, "see." Both the older gentleman and myself turned red and were left speechless! But I pulled myself together and walked away hoping not to embarrass him or myself any further. I especially wanted to get out of there before she continued the conversation!

PJ Welsch





My sister-in-law and her 3-year-old daughter, Elya, took me and my 3-year-old daughter, Acacia, and my 4-month-old son, Lane, to Toys R Us. I was nursing my son at the time. I was to run into the store and get the things I needed while everyone else waited in the car.

While I was in the store my son started crying in the back seat with the two girls. Elya said, "Mommy, I think he has a fever!" To which my daughter, Acacia, replied, "No, he wants boob!"

Carrie Otteson
Tonopah, Nevada