Vignettes of Nursing Humor IV

Short, cute breastfeeding stories from our members

While staying at my parents' home after giving birth to twin boys, I opted to breastfeed in the family room. My aunt and her daughters along with one of their your sons came for a visit that day. Everyone was in the dining room and my cousin's son was outside playing. So, I sat back and started feeding my children.

Pretty soon the young boy came into the house. He could see that I was holding the boys but did not know what I was doing. That spiked his interest. He sat himself down on one of the sofas on the far side of the room. A couple of minutes passed and he got up and moved closer to where I was sitting. After a few more minutes, he got up once again and I found him sitting right next to me.

I could see the wonder in his eyes and knew that he wanted to know what I was doing. I told him that I was giving the babies their milk. He looked at me with all the innocence of a child and said, "My Mommy gets mine out the refrigerator!" What can you say to that?

Teresa Musacchia

Tonight, as my 4 year old and 10 month old bathed, I took the opportunity to pump some milk for tomorrow using my Isis breast pump. My 4 year old discovered a clear plastic suction cup floating with her toys and attached it to her baby sister's breast, exclaiming "Mommy! I pumping Jill's booby!"

Christine Staricka

Since the day my daughter was born I referred to my breasts as her "bites". Every time she was hungry, I always asked her in my high-pitched mommy voice, "Sweetie, do you want some bites?"

One morning when she was 6 months old, I awoke to the familiar sensation of my daughter, who had been sleeping in the bed between my husband and I, nursing my breast. I opened my eyes to see that while I slept she moved my nursing gown and latched on. She was lying on her stomach face down on my breast nursing so vigorously she was gulping.

When she looked up at me and saw that I was awake and watching her, she stopped nursing and gave me a sweetly mischievous smile, unlatched from my breast and look me right in the eye and said in an extremely excited voice, "Bites!" Then went right back to nursing just as vigorously as before.

Crystal Wilson

I am tandem nursing Jesse, 11 months, and Jason, 3 3/4 years. A few months ago Jason was nursing for what seemed like forever and I finally said, "Jason, I am going to count to10 and then you need to be done." Jason quickly let go, mumbled something and grabbed my breast and nursed like crazy. I said, "what did you say??" He replied, "I said count to 21!"

Lori Hall

My daughter, Kaleigh, was 27 months old when our second daughter, Chelsea was born. I had breastfed Kaleigh and was planning on breastfeeding Chelsea as well. I had weaned Kaleigh at 3 months for various reasons, so she had no memories of it. I was wandering how I was going to explain breastfeeding to her.

Eventually, I decided to not bring up the subject and just answer any questions when she asked. Well, Chelsea came and breastfeeding went very smoothly, much easier than the first time. Kaleigh would look but never asked any questions or showed any interest.

Then one day when I went to pick her up at day care, her day care provider had a funny story for me. At naptime, Kaleigh took her baby doll and put it under her shirt. The teacher asked what she was doing. Kaleigh’s response was, "I’m feeding my baby."

The teacher asked what she was feeding her baby. Kaleigh replied "Booby milk!" I guess two year olds pay more attention than we think!

Katina Miller
North Carolina

My 5 and 3 year old children feel they can take turns "nursing " my 3 month old. Here is one of my stories.

When I was still in the hospital it became time for yet another hourly feeding. I was tired and still sore. I had a c-section and was still numb in my feet and sick due to a very high spinal block. I had lost the ability to swallow and speak during delivery. My whole face went numb.

But anyway, back to the point at hand, my 5 year old climbed up on the bed and said "I'll feed her for you mommy" I though that was so cute and even funnier because my 5 year old is a wonderful little boy named Billy.

Angela Kline