by Brenda
I have two children, a 10-year-old son and a 4-year-old
girl. I did not breastfeed my son because, at the time, it was not
something people talked about often, and if they did, I didn't listen.
When I got pregnant with my daughter I was so happy. We really wanted
her and I wanted the best for her. This time I read all the books and
listened to all the advice on breastfeeding, especially since they
told me it helps lose weight (I went up to 220 lbs, from 155).
So when she was born, the first thing the nurse did was put my
daughter on my breast. She latched on right away. I thought, "Wow
this is easy!" All throughout my hospital stay I nursed, although
I did get some comments from the nurses, things like, give her a
pacifier, she can't nurse so much, she'll get spoiled. Fortunately I
didn't listen and continued nursing.
To my excitement I went down to my pre-pregnancy weight within a
month, and my baby was thriving! But then came my next worry, going
back to work. My plan was to nurse for three months until I went back
to work and then put the baby on formula, just because I didn't want
to go through the hassle of pumping. I worked miles away and it was
impossible to come home to nurse.
When my baby was two months, I introduced her to formula, which she
immediately rejected and had a bad reaction to. We tried countless
formulas and they all made her sick. What was I going to do? I had to
go back to work soon. Sure breastfeeding was great, but now it's time
to come back down to reality. I had to go back to work. We couldn't
live on one income.
Well the day came when I went back to work, and of course I had to
leave pumped breastmilk from a manual pump (which was horrible) with
the babysitter.
I was miserable at work because I felt my baby was being deprived of
the closeness that comes with breastfeeding. This reflected on my
work, and I thought, why did I even start to breastfeed...why didn't I
just bottle feed formula from the beginning, or do both so it wouldn't
be so hard on both of us? I regretted breastfeeding at that time.
My boss took me to his office, and I spilled my guts crying about how
guilty I felt (and very engorged). He understood what I was feeling
and tried to reassure me, but nothing could make me feel better.
The next day, my boss came into my office with a huge surprise for me.
He had bought me a double electric pump, complete with breastmilk
storage bags, a cooler, bottles, you name it! And to my surprise, he
gave me 2-20 minute breaks (paid) everyday, and a private room for me
to pump. He also gave me space in the refrigerator and freezer to
store my breastmilk that was forbidden for the other employees! I was
able to pump bottles of breastmilk, not feel anymore pain, and enjoy
my job even more.
But most of all, I was able to continue feeding my daughter only
breastmilk while working a full time job, thanks to the support from
people whom you least expect to support you.
My daughter is now 4 years old, and I'm happy to say I still
breastfeed her! She is a smart, loving, healthy, active, and secure
child who has made me feel the true meaning of motherhood. I went
through hell, but now I have the most wonderful child who knows her
mother loves her and would do anything for her, without a doubt.
I am now a peer counselor helping young mothers breastfeed their
children, whether they go back to work or school. I am a living
example that it is possible and it is wonderful and so natural...and
by the way...my body looks great!
Thank you so much for giving me this opportunity to share my story.
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