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I WAS SO HAPPY TO FIND OUT I WAS BECOMING A MOM.  I AM NOT  CLOSE TO MANY OF MY OWN FAMILY MEMBERS.  ALTHOUGH,  MY HUSBAND HAS A LARGE FAMILY AND I WAS DOING WELL WITH THEM,  UNTIL THE ARRIVAL OF MY DAUGHTER....  NOW IT SEEMS AS THOUGH,  ALL THEY ARE CONERNED WITH IS LETTING ME KNOW JUST HOW MUCH I AM DOING WRONG..  
MY DAUGHTER IS B.F  SO OF COURSE EVEYINE SAYS I NEED TO MAKE HER STOP BECAUSE SHE IS TO CLOSE TO ME..  SHE IS 21 MONTHS OLD RIGHT NOW.  I HAD STARTED THE WEANING PROCESS BACK WHEN SHE WAS 14-15MONTHS OLD.. ONCE I STARTED THIS SHE STARTED AVING SET BACKS SLOWLY.  I WOULD PUT IT IN A CUP WITH A SIPPY STRAW, BECAUSE SHE REFUSES AND STILL REFUSES TAKING ANY KIND OF SIPPY CUPS WITH NIPPLE LIKE TOPS... SHE WOULD TAKE EXPRESSED MILK THAT WAY, BUT THEN SHE STARTED REFUSING TO DRINK ANYTHING..  IN TWO MONTHS TIME SHE STARTED REFUSING EXPRESED MILK IN THE CUP AS WELL.  I FIGURED SHE WAS JUST BEING HARD HEADED. SO,  I KEPT ON TRYING..  GIVING HER LESS MILK AND MORE JUICE AND WHOLE MILK(WHICH SHE WILL NOT TAKE AT ALL NOW!)  SHE FINALLY GOT TO THE POINT WHERE SHE JUST QUIT DRINKING ANY--ANY FLUIDS..  I CALLED THE DR.  THEY TOLD ME SHE HAD TO HAVE SOMETHING SO, AT LEAST LET HER NURSE AN EXTRAT TIME OR TWO DURING THE DAY (I HAD GOTTEN IT DOWN TO JUST BEDTIME NURSING ANF THE REST IN A CUP!) BY THIS POINT IT BEEN A SLOW FOUR MONTHS OF THIS AND HER SLOWLY REFUSING ANY TYPE OF LIQUID FINALY TURNED INTO NOTHING AT ALL.. SO,  I HAD NO OPTION BUT TO START HER TO NURSING A LITTLE MORE...  (WHICH WAS FINE WITH ME...  I JUST ANTED MY HUSBAND AND HIS FAMILY --WHO INFLUENCES HIS EVERY THOUGHT-- OFF MY BACK..) WELL,  SHE STARTED THE NURSING A LITTLE MORE AND ME PUMPING LESS.  THOUGH,  BY THIS POINT I HAVE NOT A CLUE THAT BECAUSE SHE WAS DRINKING LESS THE AMOUNT I WAS SEEING IN HER DIAPER WENT DOWN...  AT LEAST THAT WAS MY THOUGHTS OF WHY THE AMOUNT WAS LESS.  THOUGH,  IT WAS THAT AND THE FACT THAT LESS WAS THERE TO PASS OUT IT THE URINE WS SITTING THERE AND SHE GOT AN INFECTION,   THE DOCTORS AFTER A LONG PROCESS ALSO BELEIVE SHE HAS A SMALL URINARY OPENING WHICH HAD ONLY COMPACTED OUR PROBLEMS.... 
 I HAVE NOW DECIDED THAT OTHER NEED TO NOT INFLUNCE MY MOTHERING..  I AM AS HARD AS IT IS GOING TO BE AROUND MY HUSBANDS FAMILHY JUST TAKE THERE VERBAL ABUSE ABOUT MY MOTHERING SKILLS AND JUST LISTEN TO MY HEART WHERE IT COMES TO MY OWN DAUGHTER.  THIS IS OUR RELATIONSHIP
AND OUR TIME TOGETHER WHEN SHE NURSES AND IT SEEMS TO ME THAT THEY ARE THE ONES WITH THE PROBLEM...  (WHICH I NEVER NURSE HER IN FRONT OF ANY ONE!!  IT IS JUST THAT THEY KNOW!!)
MY DAUGHTER AND I ARE CLOSE WHICH I HOPE THIS TIME TOGETHER WILL CARRY ON THROUGH TO THE COMING YEARS.  MY DAUGHTER LIKES TO BE CLOSE TO ME AND SHE LOVES TO RIDE IN HER SLING.. (A HIP SLING)   I WAS A THIRD CHILD IN MY FAMILY AND CAN REMEMBER WANTING TO BE NEAR MY MOTHER...  THOUGH,  THERE WAS JUST NO TIME FOR ME..  I HAVE NOT SEEN OR SPOKEN TO MY MOTHER IN MANY MANY YEARS...  I WILL NOT REPEAT THAT PROCESS WITH MY OWN CHILD.  ALL I NEEDED WHEN I WAS A CHILD WAS A MOM TO LOVE ME AND LOVE BACK.  NEVER HAPPENED.  I WILL GIVE MY DAUGHTER EVERY CHANCE IN THIS WORLD TO KNOW SHE IS MY WHOLE BEING AND I WILL BE THERE NO MATTER WHAT THE REST OF THIS WORLD THINKS..  
            &nb sp;      .........BESIDES THAT,  THESE YEARS WILL BE BUT A MEMORY IN THE NEAR FUTURE AND I DO NOT WANT TO LOOK BACK AND WISH I AHD JUST LISTENED TO MY HEART AS A MOM SHOULD..... 

            &nb sp;                         &nb sp;                         &nb sp;     HAPPYMOMMY

I WAS SO HAPPY TO FIND OUT I WAS BECOMING A MOM.  I AM NOT  CLOSE TO MANY OF MY OWN FAMILY MEMBERS.  ALTHOUGH,  MY HUSBAND HAS A LARGE FAMILY AND I WAS DOING WELL WITH THEM,  UNTIL THE ARRIVAL OF MY DAUGHTER....  NOW IT SEEMS AS THOUGH,  ALL THEY ARE CONERNED WITH IS LETTING ME KNOW JUST HOW MUCH I AM DOING WRONG..  
MY DAUGHTER IS B.F  SO OF COURSE EVEYINE SAYS I NEED TO MAKE HER STOP BECAUSE SHE IS TO CLOSE TO ME..  SHE IS 21 MONTHS OLD RIGHT NOW.  I HAD STARTED THE WEANING PROCESS BACK WHEN SHE WAS 14-15MONTHS OLD.. ONCE I STARTED THIS SHE STARTED AVING SET BACKS SLOWLY.  I WOULD PUT IT IN A CUP WITH A SIPPY STRAW, BECAUSE SHE REFUSES AND STILL REFUSES TAKING ANY KIND OF SIPPY CUPS WITH NIPPLE LIKE TOPS... SHE WOULD TAKE EXPRESSED MILK THAT WAY, BUT THEN SHE STARTED REFUSING TO DRINK ANYTHING..  IN TWO MONTHS TIME SHE STARTED REFUSING EXPRESED MILK IN THE CUP AS WELL.  I FIGURED SHE WAS JUST BEING HARD HEADED. SO,  I KEPT ON TRYING..  GIVING HER LESS MILK AND MORE JUICE AND WHOLE MILK(WHICH SHE WILL NOT TAKE AT ALL NOW!)  SHE FINALLY GOT TO THE POINT WHERE SHE JUST QUIT DRINKING ANY--ANY FLUIDS..  I CALLED THE DR.  THEY TOLD ME SHE HAD TO HAVE SOMETHING SO, AT LEAST LET HER NURSE AN EXTRAT TIME OR TWO DURING THE DAY (I HAD GOTTEN IT DOWN TO JUST BEDTIME NURSING ANF THE REST IN A CUP!) BY THIS POINT IT BEEN A SLOW FOUR MONTHS OF THIS AND HER SLOWLY REFUSING ANY TYPE OF LIQUID FINALY TURNED INTO NOTHING AT ALL.. SO,  I HAD NO OPTION BUT TO START HER TO NURSING A LITTLE MORE...  (WHICH WAS FINE WITH ME...  I JUST ANTED MY HUSBAND AND HIS FAMILY --WHO INFLUENCES HIS EVERY THOUGHT-- OFF MY BACK..) WELL,  SHE STARTED THE NURSING A LITTLE MORE AND ME PUMPING LESS.  THOUGH,  BY THIS POINT I HAVE NOT A CLUE THAT BECAUSE SHE WAS DRINKING LESS THE AMOUNT I WAS SEEING IN HER DIAPER WENT DOWN...  AT LEAST THAT WAS MY THOUGHTS OF WHY THE AMOUNT WAS LESS.  THOUGH,  IT WAS THAT AND THE FACT THAT LESS WAS THERE TO PASS OUT IT THE URINE WS SITTING THERE AND SHE GOT AN INFECTION,   THE DOCTORS AFTER A LONG PROCESS ALSO BELEIVE SHE HAS A SMALL URINARY OPENING WHICH HAD ONLY COMPACTED OUR PROBLEMS.... 
 I HAVE NOW DECIDED THAT OTHER NEED TO NOT INFLUNCE MY MOTHERING..  I AM AS HARD AS IT IS GOING TO BE AROUND MY HUSBANDS FAMILHY JUST TAKE THERE VERBAL ABUSE ABOUT MY MOTHERING SKILLS AND JUST LISTEN TO MY HEART WHERE IT COMES TO MY OWN DAUGHTER.  THIS IS OUR RELATIONSHIP
AND OUR TIME TOGETHER WHEN SHE NURSES AND IT SEEMS TO ME THAT THEY ARE THE ONES WITH THE PROBLEM...  (WHICH I NEVER NURSE HER IN FRONT OF ANY ONE!!  IT IS JUST THAT THEY KNOW!!)
MY DAUGHTER AND I ARE CLOSE WHICH I HOPE THIS TIME TOGETHER WILL CARRY ON THROUGH TO THE COMING YEARS.  MY DAUGHTER LIKES TO BE CLOSE TO ME AND SHE LOVES TO RIDE IN HER SLING.. (A HIP SLING)   I WAS A THIRD CHILD IN MY FAMILY AND CAN REMEMBER WANTING TO BE NEAR MY MOTHER...  THOUGH,  THERE WAS JUST NO TIME FOR ME..  I HAVE NOT SEEN OR SPOKEN TO MY MOTHER IN MANY MANY YEARS...  I WILL NOT REPEAT THAT PROCESS WITH MY OWN CHILD.  ALL I NEEDED WHEN I WAS A CHILD WAS A MOM TO LOVE ME AND LOVE BACK.  NEVER HAPPENED.  I WILL GIVE MY DAUGHTER EVERY CHANCE IN THIS WORLD TO KNOW SHE IS MY WHOLE BEING AND I WILL BE THERE NO MATTER WHAT THE REST OF THIS WORLD THINKS..  
            &nb sp;      .........BESIDES THAT,  THESE YEARS WILL BE BUT A MEMORY IN THE NEAR FUTURE AND I DO NOT WANT TO LOOK BACK AND WISH I AHD JUST LISTENED TO MY HEART AS A MOM SHOULD..... 

            &nb sp;                         &nb sp;                         &nb sp;     HAPPYMOMMY