|
Viewing 1 - 8 out of 8 Blogs.
(I originally wrote this in my CafeMom journal. CafeMom is very mainstream, and I wanted to bring awareness to full-term breastfeeding (extended nursing). I've also changed the term "extended nursing" to "Full-term nursing" because saying "extended" suggests that we are doing something that is out of the ordinary. After posting this on my CM journal...I got 99% positive reactions. I had 2 people send me negative mail, and everyone else was positive.
So, here's goes..disclaimer and all.. ;)
*Disclaimer* This is a story about what it's like to nurse a toddler. What it's really like. If you think full-term nursing is gross, icky, and wrong or whatever, don’t read it. Don't comment, either. I've nursed 4 boys, and believe me, there is nothing you can say that I haven’t' heard before. Sure, nursing a toddler isn't for everyone, but it works for our family. The WHO and AAP recommends nursing for a minimum of 2 years. MINIMUM. Which means, we're at the minimum in the morning. BUT, that doesn't mean we are going to wean in the morning...quite the contrary, actually. We believe in child-led weaning...meaning that when my baby...no matter how, old is ready to move onto bigger (ha) and better things, then he'll let me know. In fact, the world-wide weaning age is between 2.5 and 7 years old. SO, if you feel you need to tell me what an awful mom I am for nursing past-oh, I don't know- 6 weeks, a year, once they get teeth or once they can "ask" for it...well, take that to the "I am uneducated about full-term nursing" journal, and post there. *End of Disclaimer*
So, What's it really like to nurse a toddler? Well, let’s see. At two years old, which we will reach tomorrow, most kids are pretty independent. So is my little Calen. In fact, Calen was really independent when he was just over a year. Can you believe he climbed this play structure all by himself? To the TOP? He was only a little over a year at this point.
Oh, and he loves to go down the water slide, too...ALONE! (And, of course, that was over the summer...6 months ago)
So, we know that he's independent. BUT, if he's so independent, why nurse him?
Well, the benefits of nursing a toddler go beyond a year. And, beyond milk. All the benefits your baby gets from nursing continue for as long as he continues to nurse. They go beyond he physical benefits, too. There's an emotional side to breastfeeding a toddler. We all hear about how a breastfed baby bonds differently with mom...well, it's the same with breastfed toddlers. They bond differently than a toddler that was weaned early, or never breastfed.
But, what's it LIKE to nurse a toddler?
I'm not convinced I can explain it, but it's the most wonderful thing in the world. First, you have your beautiful baby...uh, toddler, looking up at you. They look at you with the most loving eyes. Eyes that melt your heart, finding their way into your heart, into your soul. How can you not LOVE seeing this beautiful face looking up at you?
But, nursing a toddler isn't easy. It's...well, if you really want to know...it's *involved*. There are two types of breastfeeding toddlers. Toddlers don't want to "sit still" anymore. They want to run, jump, and play....and still know that mom is there with the "booboo". So, most of the nursing that happens is, what I call "Fly-By" nursing.
I feel like singing the Go, Diego, Go song, with my own words...."Quick, Take a Sip". That's really what it's like. They just run up, ask to nurse, take a "sip", and off they go. At this age, they are too "busy" to stop and *really* nurse, but they want to know it's still there.
Which is why you find a lot of toddlers like to nurse standing up.
Like that. And then, they are off again, ready to explore the world. OR, you find yourself with a toddler that nurses in the "Nurse-nastics" fashion. This is the toddler that won't sit still for anything but also won't let go of your breast, for anything. Fortunately, my toddler does both, so I'm able to show you what that looks like, too!
It starts out innocently enough...
Then you realize they have "tricked" you into thinking it was a "fly-by", and they ask for the other side.
See where his hand is? Well, you don't want it there, so you start to move it away....only to have this happen:
 
 Ok, that's enough...My face hurts! So, I try to distract him, and he decides this would be more fun:
UMMM, where are you going kiddo? Eventually, they end up like this:
Thankfully, NOT attached to the breast right now...LOL. So, as the day goes on, we nurse again....and you never know what's going to happen...
Either way, they eventually find themselves worn out at the end of the day...and what a better way to wind down than this:
Sure, nursing a toddler is exhausting, but we don't do it for ourselves. We do it for our little ones...our little ones that in 5 years, won't be nursing anymore. That in 5 years, won't climb on our backs, and jump over our shoulders. That in 5 years, won't want to cuddle up to mommy, lay down with a little hand upon our breast, and settle in for the night.
Our babies will live to be 80...maybe longer because they were breastfed...so giving just a few years of our lives...so they can have forever...isn't too much.
Sure, he's two years old now...but time flies...and I swear it was just yesterday that he looked like this:
Happy 2nd Birthday, Calen!
I'm so proud of you!!!!! Love, Mommy!
Tags: Breastfeeding Toddler Babyextended Full Term Difficulties Triumphs
Please be sure to read My Breastfeeding Story-Intro, Part 1 before you read this, so you can have the whole story.
Don't forget about the other boys' stories...if you haven't already read them:
Cole's Story-Part 2
Conner's Story-Part 3
Caden's Story-Part 4
Calen's Story-Part 5
One Final Note
Cole, so far, is my only child that has ever had ear infections. He has had tubes placed twice and his aednoids removed. He continues to have chronic ear infections today. I don't know if this has anything to do with the fact that he missed the first 6 weeks of breastmilk, but I imagine it does. There is a reason they call colostrum "Liquid Gold".
Conner has never been sick, other than kidney related problems.
Caden was found to have a Growth Hormone Deficency, but is otherwise healthy.
So far, Calen is happy and healthy.
I am happy that I finally got the wonderful breastfeeding experience that I always wanted. I truely believe that breastfeeding support is extremely important. I would not have made it past the first few weeks with Cole, had it not been for the wonderful encouragement I received from my husband. Having someone stand by your side no matter what was wonderful.
I am also very grateful to have found a wonderful Lactation Consultant with Cole. She worked a miracle for us. I only wish I was still living close to her now. I have not been able to find a good Lactation Consultant here, and I know I really could have used one with Conner.
It saddens me that other mom's that are not as prepared as I was, would stop breastfeeding because of advice given by thier doctor or nurse. New mom's look to thier doctors to give them knowledgable advice and support. with the wrong suggestions from a dr., they may worry that they are damaging thier child by continuing to breastfeed.
Finding a friend who is breastfeeding is wonderful. You can find these friends anywhere. Online, next-door, or even talking to a family member who has been there can help you get through some hard times. You may not find someone who has been through exactly the same problems, but it helps to talk about it. It really helped to hear that it was o.k. To want to give up, but that I did not need to. I am glad I did not.
Because of my breastfeeding experience, I have decided to dedicate my life to helping breastfeeding moms. I enjoy sharing my experience with others and hope to encourage other mom's to continue breastfeeding. I also hope to help moms with special needs children learn to and continue to breastfeed. Because of my children, I now know what I want to do with my life.
I often wonder...If I did not have such a hard time breastfeeding, or had I just given up and formula fed, how much would the kids and I really have missed?
Thank you for reading my story. If you have gotten nothing else from reading this, please take these two things with you:
Be proud of you accomplishments. If you breastfed 5 hours, 5 weeks, or 5 years. If you feel you didn't do enough, build on your breastfeeding knowledge, and find the answers you need to help you next time.
Finally, and most importantly, breastfeeding doesn't have to be all or nothing. If you find you aren't making enough milk, or you need to suppliment for whatever reason, you can still continue to breastfeed. Even if you only nurse once a day, you have still given your child the best.
Please let me know if you stuck through and read all my posts. I'd like to think sharing my story was helpful for someone, and it gives me the encouragment to continue helping when I can. Thank you ALL for reading, for asking for help, and offering help to others!
Tags: Breastfeeding New Mom Baby Newborn First Time Difficulties Triumphs
Please be sure to read My Breastfeeding Story-Intro, Part 1 before you read this, so you can have the whole story.
Don't forget about the other boys' stories...if you haven't already read them:
Cole's Story-Part 2
Conner's Story-Part 3
Caden's Story-Part 4
Calen's Breastfeeding Story
Calen was also born via c-section, and thankfully spent no time in the NICU after birth. During our stay in the hospital, I was able to keep Calen in the room with us for the majority of our stay. The nurses at the hospital were supportive of my breastfeeding choice, and all my parenting choices. After a few days recovery and no real nursing problems, we were free to go home. The dr. did mention, however, that Calen's billirubin count was a little high and explained that he wanted us to return for blood work the next day.
When we got home, we did notice that Calen was a little yellow, but jaundice is common in breastfed babies, and I knew that I could continue breastfeeding as normal. After the next blood test, we found that his levels were even higher. They began explaining what would probably happen if his levels were not improved by tomorrow. They told us to be prepared for a NICU stay with light therapy and suggested we formula feed for the next day.
WELL, I wasn't having any of that...surely you know me by now! I knew what needed to be done, and comforted myself by saying if I do all I can and it doesn't work, I will surrender to light theapy tomorrow...but I wasn't having this formula discussion. His dr. agreed to one more day, but told me to prepare for "the worst." I assured him I could do it.
And, I did. I nursed. And nursed. And nursed some more. When he was awake, he was nursing. During all this, Calen pooped. And pooped. And pooped some more. At the hospital the next day, they wouldn't allow us to leave until the results came back. I was nervous, but comforted that I really did all I could. Much to the doctors suprise, the levels were dropping. His exact words were "I don't know how you did it without formula, but whatever you are doing, keep doing it!" We really haven't had any problems during Calen's nursing....but we aren't finished yet.
Calen is almost 2 years old now, and is still breastfeeding. I hope he continues to breastfeed until he is happy to let go. I will update this story as our breastfeeding adventure continues. (And who knows....I may even add a weaning story...whenever that happens)
I have just one more part to this breastfeeding adventure...the conclusion. I hope you will continue to follow my breastfeeding adventure...this is the LAST part, I promise. Thanks for reading...and thanks for continuing to read!
Tags: Breastfeeding New Mom Baby Newborn First Time Difficulties Triumphs
Please be sure to read My Breastfeeding Story-Intro, Part 1 before you read this, so you can have the whole story. Don't forget about the other boys' stories...if you haven't already read them:
Cole's Story-Part 2
Conner's Story-Part 3
Caden's Breastfeeding Story
When Caden was born I was determined to make breastfeeding work with no problems. I wrote a birth plan for the hospitals to follow, requesting no bottles or pacifiers of any kind. At this point, I became a lactivist, and a Breastfeeding Peer Counselor at the local WIC office. I found out everything I could about breastfeeding and began to help others. I was sure I had it this time...
After Caden was born, also via c-section, they put him in the NICU because he had fluid in his lungs. This is common in c-section babies, so I was partly expecting this. He was in for 24 hours, and during one of my visits to him, I noticed that he had some spit-up in his mouth. I questioned the nurse about this, as I had not fed him at all yet. She informed me that she had given him a bottle of formula. I was devastated, but I knew there was nothing I could do about it now, so I tried to think positively. Although, it still bothers me to this day. I instructed her not to do that again, that I am breastfeeding and to call for his next feeding. By that time, he was safely out of the NICU, and I was able to begin nursing.
He was hesitant at first, and did not take to the breast right away. We struggled uncomfortably for a while, and finally he latched on. The nurses in the hospital were trying to be helpful, but continued to stress schedualed feedings. They didn't like the idea of rooming-in or allowing me to breastfeed on demand.
After about two days in the hospital, my nipples began to get sore. I could not believe how painful it was. We went home, and the pain just kept getting worse. I struggled with the pain until he was 6 weeks old. I finally realized that there had to be something wrong. I took Caden to the Pediatrician, and realized he had thrush. We learned how to treat him and myself, and finally the thrush went away.
Caden skipped baby food altogether and went straight to table food. He handled it very well and had quite an appetite. Around 2 years old, we realized Caden wasn't growing in length, the same way that Conner didn't grow well in the beginning. After ruling out kidney failure (because of Conner's condition), we began testing for a Growth Hormone Deficiency. After a few days of testing, we found that Caden does indeed have a GHD. Most of the time GHD can be treated with Growth Hormone Injections, the same that Conner takes. Unfortunately, our insurance will not cover Caden's GH shots, so we are battling them right now.
Caden continued to nurse throughout my next pregnancy, and for a short while after the baby was born. Breastfeeding during pregnancy isn't difficult; but can be painful. Breast tenderness is common in pregnancy, and having a nursing toddler around when you are sore accentuates the pain. I noticed that the tenderness was most painful at the beginning of the pregnancy, during each trimester change, and finally, right before birth.
Caden decided to wean after his 5th birthday, with a little encouragement from myself...but just a little. Remember that the world-wide natural weaning age is between 2.5 and 7 years old. Nursing a toddler is often frowned upon in our society, but that is only because we have sexualized the women's breast. Caden was already in Pre-K when he decided to wean. He didn't nurse in public anymore, and breastfeeding was never a topic of discussion between he and his friends. In fact while running around at school, and with his friends, breastfeeding was the LAST thing on his mind. He never was teased, never picked on, and didn't suffer "emotional damage" as many people would assume would happen in a nursing preschooler. Surprisingly Caden was the most well adjusted, friendly, well loved child at the school, with adults and with his peers. He is the most independent, secure little boy in our family...so far.
Calen's story, part 5, will be next, and I hope you will continue to follow my breastfeeding adventure! Thanks for reading...and continuing to read!
Tags: Breastfeeding New Mom Baby Newborn First Time Difficulties Triumphs
Please be sure to readMy breastfeeding storyintro/part 1 and Cole's story, part 2 before you read this, so you can have the whole story. Conner's Breastfeeding Story
Conner James was born with kidney problems and was in the NICU for about a month. He was also born via c-section, a choice I made to help correct the mistakes made during the first delivery. Here I was again, only this time it was my baby in the hospital.
I found myself having to pump again, only this time I was able to save it until he could eat. Conner's personal kidney story is also on my Cafemom Journal, and I invite you to read more about it. Hopefully this will help you understand this part of our lives better.
At only a few days old, I was able to hold Conner, and let him latch on for the very first time in his life. He took to it like a pro. The only problem was that he did not have an appetite enough to keep him hydrated, something common in Kidney Babies. Because he was still in the NICU, he had to eat on a schedule. Scheduling feedings in breastfed babies is not recommended, but especially in babies with health concerns. Conner was chronically dehydrated, and not growing on his own. The doctors needed to know what he was taking in so they asked me to switch to a bottle. I switched giving him expressed milk instead of formula.
After just a few days of the bottle, it was getting harder and harder to get him latched on. This went on for months. Conner would latch on less and less as time went on. I would try to hold him close, and he would not even let me do that. Every time I picked him up, it became a fight. (We later found out that this was due to his sensory issues, a common condition in hospital/NICU babies). I was frustrated, tired, and extremely exhausted with everything. It was all I could do to even get up in the mornings.
I finally gave up the fight and gave him nearly all expressed milk. I would only feed him at the breast if he came to me for cuddles...which wasn't that often. Along with my expressed milk in a bottle, we also NG tube-fed him. (NG tube feeding is feeding a baby through a tube that goes into their nose, down into their stomach.) I was able to pump enough for him to get all Mommas? Milk through the NG feeds as well. The NG tube lasted 8 months, before he finally learned how to eat enough to maintain his growth.
I became an expert at pumping, and had a wonderful supply this time. It also helped that I had a wonderful pump. By this time, I was involved with WIC, and found that they offer hospital grade pumps to mothers with newborns stuck in the hospital. After about 6 weeks, the pump they give to mothers is one that is reliable and durable enough to do the job.
Around 9 months, I became exhausted trying to keep up with two babies, pumping, and all the extra medical attention Conner needed. Conner continued thriving exclusively on expressed breast milk for about 11 months, with no signs of solids in sight. I had enough freezer supply to keep Conner on Momma's Milk for a month after I stopped pumping. At that point, I decided that I had done all I could, and I started weaning myself from the pump. It was a very emotionally difficult decision to make, leaving me feeling that I had let my family and Conner down. Conner continued to nurse every once and a while, but not enough for any nutritional value.
Conner started on medical formula after that, which he hated. The strong vanilla flavor was too much for his taste buds. He was on this formula for another year, and I would cringe every time I opened a can. I felt embarrassed bottle feeding in public. I was ashamed, and I felt like a failure. When I began nursing our new baby Caden, Conner come back to the breast, about once a day. He was not nursing long, only about a second or two, and mostly out of jealousy. He weaned just before his fourth birthday.
Caden's story, part 4, is next. And for those that are interested in reading Conner's kidney story, I'll post that in my journals, too. Thanks for continuing to read.
Tags: Breastfeeding New Mom Baby Newborn First Time Difficulties Triumphs
Please be sure to read My breastfeeding story-Intro/part 1...So you can see why I'm sharing our story. Cole's Breastfeeding Story
When Cole Michael was born, he was happy, healthy and ready to eat. I had him by C-section and I hoped that it would not be too painful to hold him close. There are so many different ways to hold a baby when breastfeeding, so I wasn't too worried about that.
When Cole was about 5 days old, I had a very bad pain in my stomach. I could not walk, move, eat or anything. I called my Lactation Consultant, because Cole was having a hard time latching on that day. She came out and helped me with getting Cole latched on. I mentioned my pain to her. She looked at my incision and rushed me to the hospital. In the 10 minutes it took to get there, half my body was infected. They hospitalized me right away, and I was on so much medication that I had to stop breastfeeding. My husband and mother had to feed Cole with formula from a bottle until I was able to get out of the hospital.
I decided to pump-and-dump to keep my supply going. I used the hospital pump, and it was a lifesaver. I ended up engorged while in the hospital and I seemed to be pumping whenever I was awake. I knew that I had to pump to relieve the engorgement, but I did not know that the more you pump, the more milk you make. It was a viscious cycle. I was in terrible pain and I thought it would never end.
It was about 6 weeks later when I was able to finally go home. I had to teach this little one to latch on all over again, and it was not easy. I struggled through nipple confusion, shields, which were a mixed blessing, and cracked nipples. Finally, Cole became an expert and we began to breastfeed successfully.
It broke my heart when Cole self-weaned at about 10 months. Looking back, had I known about nursing strikes, we could have probably avoided this.
Then I got pregnant again. This time I was determined to make breastfeeding work...but like last time, I had no idea what to expect...
Thanks for reading. Conner's story, part 3, is next. I will continue to post until I have my entire breastfeeding experience here on bf.com.
Tags: Breastfeedingcole New Mom Baby Newborn First Time Difficulties Trium
I will be adding my breastfeeding story for each child. I already have this posted on my myspace, and on cafemom friends, but I wanted to share with my BF.com friends that I’ve known for so long. I've been through the difficulties, and understand what breastfeeding mom's are going through. Please be sure to check back and continue reading. Each child's story is great alone, and combined, my breastfeeding adventure is amazing.
WHY I WROTE THIS
I am proud to be a breastfeeding mom. I enjoy the bond I have with my children and I know that I am giving my children the best they can possibly have. I am writing this because I know that breastfeeding is not always easy. There can be plenty of problems in the beginning and it takes a lot to stick with it. I know I am not the only one who went through problems and I know it helps to talk about them. When you are having difficulties, it is very frustrating and discouraging to have another breastfeeding mom say, "Well, I never had any problems, Breastfeeding was easy for me. For many breastfeeding mom's this is true, but for those of us who do not have it so easy it's nice to know that you aren't alone. Breastfeeding can be difficult but you can conquer almost any breastfeeding difficulty.
MY BREASTFEEDING STORY
When I was pregnant with my first son, I knew I wanted to breastfeed more than anything. I was looking forward to giving my child the best start in life. I heard so many things about special bond between mother and child. I learned that breastfeeding has many health benefits. I understood that breast milk offers more than just formula and that it contains antibodies that no formula could imitate. I knew this was something I wanted to do for my baby.
I thought everything would go easy. No one I talked to seemed to have problems, or they bottle fed and did not know anything about breastfeeding. I was not aware that there were classes available to help mom's prepare for breastfeeding and I thought, "Why read about it, how hard could it be? You just pick up the baby and, voila', he is off and breastfeeding." It is, after all, the most natural way to feed a baby.
I had no idea what to expect...
Please read part 2 to find out what happened when I started nursing Cole.
Tags: Breastfeeding Intro Difficulties Triumphs
Well, I'm lost here. But I think once I figure it out, I'll really like the new site. I'll be spending waaaayyyyy too much time on here now, tho. DH and the kids need to fend for themselves for a while, I guess.
Meanwhile...off to the forums again.
 is this supposed to be me really confused?
|
Favorites
Digg
Del.icio.us
Furl
Magnolia
StumbleUpon
Google
Yahoo MyWeb
